someone who has never been caught up in childish games, I can say
that I would not perceive that to be overly eager, in fact, I would
find it flattering. However, there are many single gals that love
to play games, so you will have to discern if this is someone who
likes sincerity or wants you to play the aloof game that so many
men seem to think does well for them. The
key in my opinion is not how many days to wait to call, but the
confidence you demonstrate when you call. I think a lot of men think
women prefer to be jerked around with aloofness and game playing,
when in reality women prefer a man who can confidently say what
he wants in a respectful manner.
in the evening. Like most of us with day jobs, this is when she's
most likely to be free to talk. Call after 8 p.m. to avoid interrupting
her dinner, but before 10 p.m. in case she goes to bed early. If
she seems busy or rushed, ask her if you're calling at a bad time.
And if she says that you are, don't ask her to call back. Just find
out when a better time would be for you to phone again. You want
to keep the ball in your court.
From A Comfortable Setting
comfortable and relaxed, it shows through in your voice. Avoid calling
from the office or from the car when you're stuck in traffic. Calling
from these places is not only uncomfortable, it's also distracting.
Instead, call from a quiet room in your pad. You want her to know
that she has your undivided attention.
Your Voice Relaxed And Clear
like a man who sounds cool and confident.
to get your voice sounding its best:
out loud with your mouth closed. This is a little trick that can
help you train your voice to sound deeper right before a conversation.
2) Call standing
up. Talking while standing up will also lend a deeper tone to your
3) Talk slowly.
Take your time with your words. People sound nervous when they speak
masturbating before you call, you will be more relaxed and your
voice will reflect it.
to make small talk in a first phone call, but you can still try
to keep the conversation interesting. Avoid cliché topics
like the weather and politics, and focus instead on subjects that
are relevant to both of you.
You also want
to be mindful about talking too much about yourself as women notice
these things. Actively engage her in the conversation by asking
questions instead of just answering the ones she throws your way.
Ask her about herself and what she's been up to since you first
met, then let the conversation flow from there.
Just keep it
light and easygoing. One item you should make sure not to delve
into is past relationships. This is a touchy topic of conversation
at any point in a relationship, and it's an especially delicate
one during a first phone call. Talking about past dates that went
sour or relationships where mistakes were made is a guaranteed downer.
References To When You Met (If
out of things to talk about? Try using references to when you met
to spark a new direction for the conversation: Was there a random
song playing in the background? Was there something memorable that
she said? Was there a funny incident at the bar? The possibilities
are endless. Try to think of a few things that were memorable about
the time you met beforehand to avoid those awful, awkward moments
one thing nearly all women look for in a guy: the ability to make
them laugh. Try to drop a few jokes during the conversation to let
her know that you have a sense of humor. But don't overdo it: you
don't want to come off like you're doing an act.
your love of Italian food can be good. Revealing your love of porn
flicks right off the bat can be bad. There's a fine line between
being comfortable and being crude, so make sure you keep the conversation
tasteful. By the same token, don't put too much emphasis on framing
yourself as high-class. Pompous guys can be just as insufferable
as crude ones.
A Specific Date
that you have an idea in mind for a date before you call. Remember;
the ball's in your court, so you're going to be the one to hammer
out the details. Be specific about a location and day that you'd
like to meet up. Where should you go? Grabbing a drink together
always makes for a relaxed first date, and you can consult one of
the various nightlife guides out there for tips on a good spot.
Be assertive, but have a backup plan. If she can't make it that
day or doesn't like the type of place you suggest, then propose
an alternative. If at that point she still refuses, let her offer
Up Once You've Secured The Date
feel the need to keep the conversation going after she agrees to
a date. That's the primary objective of the first phone call, and
she knows it. There will be plenty of time for deep conversation
later on. In general, the phone call shouldn't last longer than
five to 10 minutes. The less time you chat, the smaller the window
to blurt out something you may later feel was stupid.
she knows you're interested in her romantically. The last thing
you want is for this potential hook up to turn into friends just
hanging out. Don't suggest going out with a group of people. Nothing
says platonic like a group date. Furthermore, make sure that you
get together at night, as daytime dates can feel unromantic. You
can also offer to pick her up. This will send a clear signal that
what you're proposing is a romantic date.
Leave A Message
doubt, hang up If she's not home, never leave a message. You don't
want to make the same mistake that Jon Favreau's character did in
Swingers. Nothing good can come out of talking to her voice
mail. If someone else answers the phone, just say that you'll call
back later. Remember; you always want the ball in your court.