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This
Issue's Sex Joke
Little
Old Lady In The Sex Shop
A little old lady entered the sex shop and
asked in a quivering voice, "Yy-young man, dd-do y-you sell-dildos
h-here?"
The
salesman, somewhat taken aback by the little old lady's appearance
in his shop, answered
"Uh,
yes, ma'am. We do."
The
little old lady, holding her quivering hands about 10 inches apart
asked, "D-do y-you ha-aave any ab-bb-bout th-this l-long?"
"Well,
yes ma'am, we do. We have several that size."
Forming
a 5" circle with her fingers, she then asked, "A-are an-nny ofth-them
about thi-is b-big ar-round-d?"
"Well...
Yes, a few of them are about that big."
"D-do
aa-ny of th-them ha-ave a vv-ii-bra-a-ator?"
"Yes,
Ma'am, one of them does."
"W
-Wel-ll, h-how d-do y-you t-turn it off?"
Why The Penis
Is The Perfect Shape
The Benefits of The Male Anatomy
|
Upon
looking at a male's penis, you may wonder why it
looks the way it does, having a shaft with a bulbous
head with a ridge around the bottom of it (coronal
ridge).
The
answer is based on two main factors both of which
have to do with the overall biological need for
heterosexual males to impregnate women.
Because
our bodies are designed to be competitive with members
of the same sex when it comes to our reproductive
organs, men are geared to eliminate other male competition
by being able to most effectively impregnate a woman.
The shape of the human penis is designed to do just
that.
|

Lisa S. Lawless, Ph.D., C.E.O.
Holistic
Wisdom Founder
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The
longer and thicker a man's penis the more effective he
can be at eliminating sperm from another man because
if a woman has more than one male sexual partner over
48 hours, then the sperm of these men compete for reproductive
access to her egg.
The
Role of Length & Width-
Length-
The average male penis is 5 - 6 inches and this allows
a man's penis to reach up toward the
woman’s cervix. Depending on the length, in some cases,
a male's penis can lift her uterus allowing him
to leave sperm deeper inside the vagina than another man.
Head
Width-
The width of the coronal
ridge is particularly important for two reasons-
-
It allows a man to effectively remove the sperm of another
male from the vagina. It moves up the vagina and then
drags the sperm of another male out of the vagina by
the coronal ridge.
-
It
stimulates the female's gspot which provides sexual
arousal and in turn stimulates the cervix which will
begin pulling upward creating a suction that will allow
sperm to more effectively reach the an egg.
The
Importance of the Refractory Period-
After
men ejaculate, they experience a refractory period which
means that they will lose their erection to half its full
erect size within on minute of ejaculating. Their penises
also become hypersensitive which will make further stimulation
to the penis feel unpleasant. Men typically stay in the
refractory period between 30 minutes to 24 hours and are
rendered temporarily impotent following ejaculation. The
reason this occurs is o prevent removal of a man's own
sperm from his partner's vagina.

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Getting
Ready To Stay In
Submitted By
Anonymous
In the shower
your pushed into my chest, your hair pushed to the side exposing
your neck, I've got my lips drawn back and my teeth, firmly, slowly
gnawing on the back left of your neck, moving up and down, no
real rhythm, just tasting my way. My hands held tight at your
waist, my thumbs pressing in to the sides at the very base of
your back, my fingers firmly massaging down towards the front
of your inner thighs.
You can feel
the arousal pressed up at the top of your cleft and pressed hard
against your lower spine (very low, this is why I've had to develop
many talents!!! NOT).
I start to
nibble around the side of your neck and massage the flesh with
my lips, then along your shoulder as my left hand starts to go
higher and my right hand further around and down.
I go back
to biting your neck, mouth wide open and scraping your skin with
my fangs (yes, they're only little and natural!). my left hand
reaches up to your right breast lifting it up and squeezing firmly,
I stretch my fingers out and brush your nipple. My right hand
gliding over your mound and underneath easing its way between
your thighs. As I draw the hand back slightly the middle finger
traces a warm wet line.
My teeth release
your neck and my lips start kissing their way up towards your
ear. Your hands reach behind squeezing their way between us and
reaching for me. My left hand is still massaging your right breast.
My right hand slips low again and the middle finger draws you
wider and my finger is now pressed firmly against you, slowly
curling and uncurling. I let go of your breast reach up and take
hold of your hair. Turn you to face me, your right hand reaching
for my shoulder, your left taking hold below and you again draw
yourself tight to me.
I'm still
holding your hair and tilt your head slightly to your left and
facing you up towards me, I lean my head forward, kissing you
just below your lips, just one peck before I then plant them lightly
at first against yours.
As the massage
of our lips increases I release my hold of your hair, the fingers
of my left hand firmly making their way to the base of your back,
the hand spreading open to heavily brush it over your right cheek,
my fingers deep between the cheeks taking in your measure. My
right hand tucks under your left hand and finds again the track
it had traced.
As the massage
of our lips increases, the stroke of your left hand tightens but
stays steady. Your right hand reaches over the shoulder and your
nails bite lightly into my flesh. My left hand slides between
your thighs from the back and the palm of my right hand brushing
heavily downwards against your hairs as the middle finger drawing
slow circles between your lips. Your legs start to open, just
a little. I stroke my finger back and up a little inside your
lips, massaging firmly a pinch of flesh. You tingle, a faint shiver
running through you and I grip you tighter into me.
Your left
hand releases and reaches underneath seemingly weighing things
up? Your hand slowly closing and massaging. You reach your tongue
into my mouth and begin to flick at the end of mine (I think I
should be in the shower now... A cold one!!). I return the sensation,
but with my finger and much lower down.
I draw back
my lips from yours and step out of the shower, reaching out my
hand for you to hold ( as a normal gent would, give me some credit!!)
you take my hand and step out after me, we make it as far as the
doorway before I again draw you in close, my hands roaming all
over your body, our lips locked, I know inside my head is reeling
with passion, pressing my lips tighter to yours trying to pour
all that I feel inside of you. Your right hand taking tight hold
on my hip, your left held firmly against my chest again using
your nails to claw inside of me.
My left hand
held firmly against your lower back, my right hand rises and takes
hold of your hair, once more drawing your head back. I trace lightly
down and across your neck with my tongue, letting go of your hair
I continue my way down. My right hand now pulls around and lifts
your breast up, my mouth encircling your nipple, teeth teasing,
tweaking. Your right hand reaches up holding the back of my neck,
your left hand now over my shoulder. My left hand moving across
your cheek, thumb pulling over the top of your hip and then the
whole hand strokes down the out side of your thigh. You try to
grab my hair but can get no grip (since it's so short!.. my hair..
on the head.. the one on my neck... bloody hell woman any one
would think you were sex mad!!). To make it easier I lift my face
towards you and yet still descend. As my knees hit the floor,
I then lower my face once more (hey I'm a poet and didn't know
it!!).
And begin
to press my lips against the flesh and trimmed hairs, then kissing
your lips as my hands reach either side at the top rear of your
thighs and open you up just a little. My tongue flicking against
your lips then going lower and holding my tongue stiffly I draw
from bottom to almost top tasting and circling the ambrosia. I
push you back towards the door frame my face still buried.
I press my
face harder against you and you use both hands on my head adding
to the pressure. My lips massaging you. My tongue flickering,
circling, stroking and entering.
You back harder
against the doorframe and raising yourself on your toes. I gain
a better angle and my tongue slips deeper, curling and tasting
the inside of your walls. I hold tighter onto your cheeks, my
fingers pressing into the very top of your thighs. Your hips begin
to sway grinding yourself against my face, small circular movements,
slowly at first, I draw back my tongue and again lick a little
higher, your movement falters for a moment and then returns a
little harder, a little faster.
You remove
your right hand from my head and lift it to your own gripping
your hair tight. You push harder against my face lifting one of
your legs trying to climb on to my face, your movements getting
harder, faster, a tremor breaks your rhythm, you return again
harder, and faster, another tremor, but you won't let them break
your rhythm now, my tongue pressing hard against you little movements
but heavily felt, your right hand returns to the back of my head,
your nails now digging in, annoyed that you cannot pull on anything.
Suddenly a shudder, your rhythm affected.. Not mine, I press harder
now, you try to return the force but the shudders are getting
deeper, less controllable.
Both your
hands reach now on the top of my head your fingers dropping to
the sides, no rhythm from you now, your just pushing as hard as
you can against my face,
You feel
the tenseness shoot up your back, you neck muscles tighten and
you face looks up the ceiling, your whole body shudders and I
feel the warmth fill my mouth XXX
My hands take
a firm hold over your hips and I slowly rise. Pressing my tongue
against you as I rise over your stomach, switching a little to
your left and my tongue slides onto your left breast, my lips
closing over your nipple. My tongue presses and circles your nipple
and I gently suck.
Your hands
still resting on my shoulders. Your fingers pressing your nails
lightly into me.
I slowly ease
off your breast and raise my face to yours, you tilt your head,
eyes closed, to your right. My hands begin to stroke upwards and
around your back. Your right hand strokes around the back of my
neck, brushing lightly through the hair at the back of my head
then as you lower your forehead into the right hand side of my
neck your hand slips to the side and pushes a little so the side
of my face is against your head. Your left hand slips down from
my shoulder and onto my chest, you tease the nipple with your
fingers. You then use your index finger to trace a line back up
to my shoulder and down the arm to the elbow where you then let
your hand slip to my side and down to my hip.
I pull you
in tightly and press myself against you, you brush your lips on
my neck as you feel my hardness pushing onto you. You open your
mouth and begin to breathe deeply my scent, your right hand slipping
to my neck and your left pushing between us you reach down and
cup your hands beneath me. You softly massage me and feel me twitch
against you.
Your right
hand slides onto the top of my chest and you push me back a little.
Your left hand lifts a little and you press your fingers against
the base of my shaft. Your right hand continues downwards, your
fingers teasing over my stomach. I lean my head forward and kiss
your lips. My own hands releasing your waist and moving to your
upper arms. You return my kisses, our lips locked and pressed
firmly against each other drawing each emotion from one another.
Your right
hand now slips beneath me and gently massages as your left hand
encircles me. Our lips depart and you kiss down the front of my
neck, you then tilt your head to your right and lower your mouth
over my piercing, flicking and rolling it with your tongue as
your lips enclose around it. Your hand stroke, slow and firm,
you feel it getting harder with each stroke.
Now you bend
your knees and begin to nibble your way down my stomach. The fingers
of my left hand stroke up the right side of your neck and massage
into your hair, my right hand caresses over your shoulder and
reaches down to your left breast.
You hold him
to the left as you taste your way down my abdomen and lifting
my balls with your right hand you place your lips around them
and suck. I close my eyes, the fingers of my left hand pressing
in to your hair a little firmer.
You kiss your
way to the base of me while the fingers of your left hand brush
softly up and down the length. Opening your mouth a little wider
you suck on the side of my shaft. Both my hands now rest onto
your shoulders and my fingers and thumbs massage into you. Releasing
me from your lips you begin to flick with your tongue towards
the tip, pressing your lips back to him when you reach the drawn
back foreskin. You lick and kiss around the base of the head.
You look up
and see my head drawn back in pleasure before kissing the tip
and slowly enveloping it with your lips. Your right hand massaging
the sack beneath and the fingers of your left hand pressing down
around the base. You ease back and forward taking just the head
into your mouth, I shudder. My left hand strokes up the side of
your neck and I run my fingers through your hair.
You kneel
up a little straighter and lower your head all the way to the
fingers of your left hand at my base taking my full length inside
your mouth. (I'm leaking... again!!!). with your lips closed firmly
around me you draw back up to the head. Once there you begin to
flick your tongue around the sides while he is still in your mouth
and you lower yourself back onto him, your tongue sliding down
the side, when you reach the base you turn your tongue from one
side of him to the other. The feeling is beyond words, my right
hand joins my left in massaging through your hair, I look down
watching you, body afire, I feel so light and begin to bite my
lip. You feel me twitch inside you and start to move up and down
my length a little faster.
You move both
your hands to my hips and grip onto the sides of my cheeks drawing
yourself deeper onto me. I have never felt this deep before in
my life and my hips rise a little wanting to go deeper. You draw
back to the head, release and begin kissing and flicking with
your tongue. I try to lean down to kiss you, your right hand reaches
up to my chest and pushes me back. Our eyes meet and you shake
your head slowly.
Your right
hand has now taken hold of me and taking a firm hold, moves up
and down the shaft. You look up to me once more before closing
your eyes and then directing him with your right hand you again
take me inside your mouth. Moving your head forward and back,
taking in just the head at first but taking in more with each
downward movement until you are again at the base of the shaft
with each stroke. You are again using your tongue and my grip
gets a little firmer in your hair. I begin to twitch again and
your movement seems to quicker with each flicker I make inside
your mouth.
You reach
beneath me again with your left hand and press your fingers into
the flesh just below the sack. I twitch again and you are now
taking me as deep as I can reach, your tongue pressing firmly
on me inside your mouth as your lips are pressed firmly around
the outside of my shaft. You suck harder knowing I'm unable to
hold back.
I twitch and
you taste me leaking inside your mouth and on the back stroke
you press and lick firmly over the eye. I twitch again and you
bury me deep inside you.
My hands now
held tightly to your head, another twitch, your tongue pressed
hard against the base of me while inside you, you feel my come
begin to rush up the shaft and you hold yourself tightly to me.
I flick my head backwards and bang it against the door frame,
All I feel is myself about to explode below.
You feel the
hot liquid hitting the back of your throat, once, twice,,, then
a third time. You keep yourself held against me and gently suck,
drawing out all I had inside me. Your draw your self back along
the length, your lips slipping over the tip, your right hand taking
hold at the base and you milk the last few drops, lashing them
from my tip with your tongue.
My head held
forward and my eyes closed, you look up to me, and know that once
again you have blown my mind (XXX). Keeping hold of him you stand
and lean yourself against me. My arms wrap around you and I kiss
your neck, your chin. I press my lips to yours.
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Sexual
Wisdom
Sex
In The News
This
section is for sexual current events and news; allowing our web
site visitors to hear sex news around the world.
PETA
Commercial Banned
Liberator
Shapes In Adam Sandler Romantic Comedy
Liberator
Bedroom Adventure Gear is making an appearance in Adam Sandler's
romantic comedy, “Born to Be A Star.” The movie is about small-town
guy that discovers a family secret that his parents were once
famous porn stars in the 1970s. Upon learning this, he leaves
Northern Iowa for Hollywood, hoping to follow in their footsteps.
Also
on board is Christina Ricci who will be showing off the Wedge/Ramp/Whirl
Trio, with actresses in the scene will wearing Liberator
Lingerie .

Church
Sermons About Sex Causing A Stir
A
Brevard, FL Public School District's risk-management department
is looking to get rid of the New Hope Church out of Sherwood Elementary
because of a worship series titled "Great Sex for You." Church
leaders mailed 25,000 fliers, asking residents "Is Your Sex Life
A Bore?" The three-week program kicked off inside the school auditorium.
Pastor Bruce Cadle had said the Christian church has been "shamefully
silent" on the taboo topic. Mark Langdorf, the director of risk
management, says the mailers generated complaints, were not appropriate
for elementary school children and shouldn't be used to advertise
the sermon in the school. Langdorf says the church's lease contract
is under review.
Breast
Milk Cheese Served At Art Show
Cheese
made with breast milk has been served at the launch of a new art
exhibition in London. Mexican artist Raul Ortega Ayala named the
show "Alejandra Ortiz-Reynoso", after the woman who donated the
milk, the Daily Express reported. The cheese is designed to "explore
our first encounter with food, emphasizing its territoriality
and boundaries", according to the artist. A spokeswoman said:
"He makes the cheese in the normal way - it's just a standard
process. "The women donate the milk to him voluntarily." The cheese
was served simply, with a more traditional accompaniment of crackers.
Ayala's next work, "Obituary Menus", will recreate the food which
presidents, public figures, mass murderers and cavemen ate before
they died.
Protection
For The Vajayjay With the VA J-J Visor?
| The
VA j-j Visor is an insertable flexible cup that covers the
inner vulva area inner labia, clitoris, and vaginal opening.
It is designed to provide protection for sensitive parts that
you don't want exposed during such things as Brazilian and
bikini waxing, depilatories and shaving, hair coloring, tanning
or spa treatments. It can also be used as a hygienic shield
while trying on swimwear or intimate apparel, and during body
piercings and tattooing. |
 |
Cholesterol
Drugs May Protect Sexual Potency
In
a new study, cholesterol drugs taken to prevent heart attacks
may also lower the risk of prostate cancer and impotence in aging
men. Men taking any of several different statin drugs for their
cardiovascular health had a threefold lower chance of being diagnosed
with prostate cancer compared with those not taking the drugs,
according to a 15-year study of men ages 40 to 79 by the Mayo
Clinic of Rochester, Minnesota. Those taking any of the medicines,
including Merck & Co.’s Zocor and Pfizer Inc.’s Lipitor, also
had a lower incidence in later years of erectile dysfunction,
benign prostate enlargement and urinary problems. There may be
an association but not causation, however, as a previous study
of 1 million people observed by the American Cancer Society’s
CPS-II research found no effect of statins on cancer,.
Don't
Be Fooled By The Tight Shirts At Hooters
Christopher
Childers snuck into a car and surprised two 19-year-old Hooters
waitresses because he said that the Hooters women "looked easy"
and his girlfriend is "very conservative." The girls proceeded
to beat him up as one girl slammed the door on his leg, the other
called the police. He was then charged him with felony entering
an auto.
Study
Shows Sexual Satisfaction at 70 Improving
A
new Swedish study reinforces what many professionals in the area
have long suspected -- sexual activity and satisfaction are on
the rise among the elderly. The study, from Gothenburg University
in Sweden, showed that self-reported levels of sexual satisfaction
among 70-year-olds in Gothenburg has been on the rise, from 58
percent of 70-year-old men reporting satisfaction in 1976-77 to
71 percent reporting sexual satisfaction in 2000-01. Among women,
the increase was from 41 percent to 62 percent during the same
period. "I think it's very important for older people to know
that it's quite normal to have sexual feelings, and it's important
for health professionals to know that they are sexually active
or would like to be, and they should take that into consideration,"
said Nils Beckman, a doctoral student at Gothenburg and the lead
author of the study.
Miss
California Topless Again
Miss
California Carrie Prejean seems to think she's being persecuted
because of her Christian beliefs, but that's getting harder to
believe with the release of each new topless photo. Prejean told
pageant officials last Tuesday that the topless photo that surfaced
last week was the only one she ever posed for. But now, the beauty
queen will have to explain how TMZ obtained several additional
photos of her wearing not much more than Adam and Eve, before
that serpent led them astray. Now, the world awaits news of whether
Miss Universe co-owner Donald Trump will say, "You're Fired."
Doesn't it seem like we've been down this road before?
Sex
Theme Park Prepares To Open In Chongqing
Naked
human sculptures, giant replica genitals, a photo exhibition about
sex history and sex technique workshops. China's first sex-themed
park has not even opened yet, but the controversial project has
already got some people hot under the collar.
Thank
You For Reading
The Holistic Wisdom Journal

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