American
liquor manufacturers have accepted the FDA's suggestion
the following warning labels be placed immediately on
all varieties of alcohol containers:
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol
may leave you wondering what the
hell happened to your bra and panties.
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are
whispering when you are not.
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your
friends
over and over again you love them.
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you
can sing.
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe ex-lovers
are really dying for you to telephone them at four in
the morning.
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can
logically
converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable
rug burns on the forehead, knees and lower back.
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion you
are
tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most
people.
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people
are laughing with you.
Weight
Loss How
I Got My Body Primed To Do It
Lisa
S. Lawless, Ph.D., C.E.O.
Holistic Wisdom Founder
Lisa
S. Lawless, Ph.D., CEO
Healthy
weight loss is not merely starving your body of calories as
that only causes other parts of your body to become stressed,
including putting your metabolism on alert that you are "starving,"
thus slowing it down.
The key
to healthy weight loss is providing your body with the optimum
nutrients it need to lose weight. Kind of like taking your car
in for servicing to make sure that it is going to run at it's
optimum levels. When your body is running at it's optimum levels,
it can then flush the excess weight out of your system more
easily while still allowing you to feel energized.
Being someone
who has lost a lot of excess weight after having my son, I can
tell you that it took me a long time to figure out how to do
it and keep it off. I had tried many diets and lost weight only
to gain it back again. I spent a great deal of time studying
nutrition to understand what the body actually needs to lose
weight, and keep it off while not causing it harm such as overdosing
on caffeine, Ephedra (Ma Huang) and other types of stimulants
that may cause more harm than good.
Being someone
who generally dislikes exercise and has a very full schedule
I needed to find things that were quick and easy and not a part
of some fad diet that would deplete my energy levels during
the day. Because of my busy life, I needed all the energy I
could get and when trying diets I found I was easily fatigued
and actually felt weak. I also found that they were hard to
do since I don't like cooking very much and I don't like having
to think about a bunch of details about counting calories, fat,
vitamins, points, carbs, etc. Diets that made me write stuff
down and spend a lot of time calculating or cooking were not
going to work for me because I knew I would not be able to keep
it up long term.
Kary
Bennett, M.A., C.N.
Founder of Essential Wellness
Isn't that
what we are really are talking about here... long term, because
anyone who had lost weight and kept it off knows that it is
a lifestyle change not a diet that will be the winning ticket.
So, I struggled for a few years until I found something that
I could do everyday with little effort.
I was chatting
with my friend (Kary Bennett) who is a nutritionist and was
telling her my struggle. I told her that I was really frustrated
and did not know what to do. I had tried prescription medication-
Phentermine,
and even took an Asian
Cooking Class, and while those things helped, I still
could not figure out how to consistently follow a routine that
would ensure my body was getting all the nutrients it needed
to optimize weight loss, feel energized and keep it off while
making it easy. That's when she introduced me to a company that
has a really healthy and easy weight loss system.
Intrigued,
I asked her more... I mean, considering that she spent her entire
career studying nutrition I wanted to get her inside view into
why she thought this company was a good one and had quality
products. She told me that this company (Oasis) was a true leader
in the field of health because they use the highest quality
raw materials from their own farms and forests around the world.
They also test the ingredients and formulas at the DNA level
- a process called Genomics. Currently, no other natural products
company uses Genomics to test its products. I was impressed,
after all it seems that there are so many companies that throw
things together and never test them, let alone at the DNA level!
When I look
at the diet foods out there I have to think that most companies
take us for complete idiots. Look at the ingredients in a SlimFast
drink or bar... the 1st 4 ingredients are skim milk, sugar,
fructose and cocoa, in other words: milk, sugar, sugar and chocolate.
Honestly, I can't think of much worse other than eating a bunch
of lard on a high protein diet!
When you
look for a health drink, health bar or other diet product make
sure you look at what they are really serving you. If it's like
most out there you might as well just have a snickers bar because
it's basically the same ingredients! Certainly these sugar based
"diet" products are not going to give you the fuel
your body needs to keep going strong during and after weight
loss. The
high protein/low carb products are not much better.
If you drink
or eat something that is high in sugar, you are going to be
hungry and that leads to any easy failure on your diet. It is
important to find something that tastes good and has no refined
sugar, corn syrup or fructose.
I got the Oasis weight loss products called Inthinity (it has
no sugar, instead it uses Stevia
to sweeten) and I am not kidding you when I say that within
10 minutes of drinking my first morning shake I really began
to feel good. It was like my body was saying "Geeze, chick
it's about time!" It also makes you feel full just like
a meal and that to me is also impressive.
If you are
like me, your day consists of energy peaks and valleys as you
battle with hunger, cravings, and fatigue but this shake- MetaFuel
has a time-released energy system that keeps you within your
ideal energy zone to help you feel invigorated and satisfied.
I felt great all day.
It is a
delicious meal replacement beverage that provides an ideal protein
to carbohydrate ratio. It's a nutritional powerhouse designed
specifically for the metabolic needs of your body, making it
a complete "meal in a glass" with zero saturated fat. I love
them, they are so delicious too, my hubby drinks them too because
they are not only good for weight loss, but just for keeping
the body in good shape regardless of weight.
The next
week, I got the supplements MetaPower And MetaBurn.
They really made a difference as well. MetaPower helps to maintain
the ideal balance of essential fats to optimize fat-burning
and energy production.
It is now
known that a critical balance of essential fats in your diet
dramatically influences whether your body burns or stores fat.
MetaPower helps to maintain this critical balance to
access stored fat to create energy. The result is a leaner,
more invigorated body. MetaPower ingredients have been
shown to contribute to better brain function, immune support,
and healthier looking skin. I can say that I do feel sharper
in my ability to concentrate and my skin is not dry even when
I skip lotion. Living in arid Colorado, that is saying a lot!
MetaBurn
contains all-natural ingredients that support fat-burning without
harmful side effects. Whether the fat is concentrated on your
thighs, hips or abdomen, MetaBurn can assist your body in reducing
fat. It is the ultimate fat-loss energizer, without Ma Huang
or Ephedra - so you won't experience an increase in heart rate
or feel agitated.
Exercise-
I also began
walking my dog in the morning for 45 minutes and found that
it too helped me to feel more energized and provided a good
means of exercise for both my dog and myself. I got an exercise
bike as well so that on rainy or snowy days there is no reason
why I can't have some exercise.
What ended
up happening was that I began to feel so good, that I actually
looked for ways to exercise from hikes, to swimming and more.
I felt wonderful and for the first time in my life really felt
fantastic physically.
Why
Am I Sharing All This With You Now?
Guilt...
as I continued to lose weight and feel so wonderful I began
to feel guilty that I was not telling people about this in our
newsletter. I always like to share things that really work well
and are great products so I began to look into how I could make
them easy for people to get because the Oasis products are hard
to find in stores.
I called
Oasis and found that they had a very rigid retailer program
that made me jump several hoops to carry their products and
required we pay near retail prices for them to have them on
our web sites. I did not care so much about making money on
these products, I just wanted you to know about them and make
them easy for you to acquire.
I am happy
to report, I finally got permission and I added them to our
site just this week. There are a lot more products that they
carry and I will be adding them all. I did make sure to add
all the products that I use to the site this week, because I
can personally vouch for them and wanted to make them available.
Oasis
Health Products
Whether you want healthy shakes
or supplements to assist you with weight loss, added energy,
or just to help slow down the aging process, look no further
we carry the best quality in health products available!
Advanced
Fellatio Instruction
Read
and see much more through The Art of Fellatio Manual available
online or in a soft cover binder with
8 minutes of video available as a download or on CDROM.
See
what is covered in the
manual and video below-
Positions
Techniques
Instruction
Media
Basic
& Best
68 1/2
69
Face Fucking
On Your Knees
On The Side
Visual Importance
Stage Fright
The Exhibitionist
Deep
Throat
Gagging Remedy
Using
Teeth
Kisses & Tongue
Do The Twist
Shirley Temple Licks
Head, Shaft & Scrotum
Grabbing His Behind
Making Him Tight
Hand Job Combo
Vacuum
Double Penetration
Teeth Guards
Thigh Highs
Hummers
The Harmonica
The Drum
Hot & Cold
Women's Lubricant
Hands On Your Head
Adore The Cock
Penis Anatomy
Messes
Orgasms
Perineum Love
Anal Love
Nipple Love
Mouth Love
Fatigue Warning
Health Concerns
STD Prevention
Hygiene
Tips For Receiver
Clean Up
Post Etiquette
Toys & Products
Fellatio In Water
FREE
Pictures- A variety of close ups from
Lisa Lawless' home library.
FREE Video- Approximately 8 minutes of various personal
video clips from Lisa Lawless' home library.
The video clips are for entertainment and do not contain
instruction. They are available as a download or on CDROM.
Real Player or Windows Media Player is required to view
it.
Instant
Access- For
Web Access to our manual of
Advanced
Fellatio positions, techniques, pictures & a
bonus FREE Instant
Access of 8 minute Video Download
Manual
& CDROM- For
a Hard Copy of the manual of
Advanced
Fellatio Positions,
Techniques, Pictures & a bonus FREE CDROM
of 8 minute Video
$14.99
Premature
Ejaculation A
Realistic Understanding
Reality
Robert W. Birch, Ph.D.,
Sexologist & Adult Sexuality Educator
The
Problem
Many
men are concerned with their rapid ejaculation. The greatest
concern is expressed among younger men, but many of these settle
down as they age. Most men have had the experience of losing
control in a passionate encounter with a new and exciting woman,
but familiarity typically will take care of this. However, there
are men of all ages who ejaculate rapidly every time, even as
they and their relationship ages.
The
Definition
So,
what is premature ejaculation? The term implies that it happens
early, before it is due, and most men have taken this to mean
that their orgasm occurs before they have had time to enjoy
intercourse, before the woman has had time to enjoy intercourse,
or before the partner has been able to reach her orgasm during
intercourse. Let's start with the last... female orgasms during
intercourse. The reality is that the majority of women do not
and can not reach orgasm during intercourse, no matter how long
the man can endure. There just is not enough clitoral stimulation
in the majority of intercourse positions.
We
don't want anyone to miss the point! Intercourse is not necessarily
the most effective way to bring a woman to orgasm! This is perhaps
why men seem more concerned with the problem than do many of
their partners. Many women enjoy the manual and ora
The
Label
I
prefer the term rapid ejaculation over premature ejaculation,
for I believe it better defines the behavior and carries less
stigma. Some men are fast... they ejaculate rapidly. But how
fast is fast? The average young healthy male with ejaculate
in about 3 to 4 minutes with nonstop trusting, and some say
that average is even faster... 2 to 3 minutes. So, let's say
that a young man who ejaculates after three minutes of steady
thrusting is within the average range. I have seen men who could
last 5 minutes, but believed they were premature ejaculators
because they thought they should be able to last as long as
they like and ejaculate at will. Are there men who naturally
last 15 minutes or more? Of course there are, but there are
also men who cannot ejaculate at all. Like I have said, it's
on a continuum, from one extreme where men who ejaculate prior
to penetration to those who do not get there at all.
What's
The Cure?
That answer is easy. There is none, because rapid ejaculation
is not an illness! One highly respected sex therapist claims
a "cure" can be achieved in fourteen weeks, while another says
eight to twelve. The problem with the concept of "cure" is the
implication that once fixed, you can forget all about the illness.
A follow-up study, however, demonstrates the error in this thinking,
for this research found that three years after being "cured,"
the majority of the men were ejaculating just as rapidly as
they were before entering therapy. What happens when men expect
a cure and professionals offer it is that once improvement is
gained, everyone quits working on the ejaculatory control and
nothing has really been changed!
What
Is The Answer?
That
is like asking, "How do you get to Carnegie Hall." The answer,
"Practice, practice, practice." I believe men can learn effective
strategies for the management of their ejaculatory response.
It is possible to learn what is needed to do to stay in control,
but once learned, a man can never stop managing his response.
I believe it is a long process, but can be a joyful one. Quite
honestly, men who are not in loving relationships with understand
and cooperative women are at a disadvantage. What needs to be
learned and practiced is done best within the context of a healthy
and playful relationship. However, it will help a single male
if he understands the process needed for control and there are
ways the can begin practicing on his own.
Look
For The Easy Answers
I
think we all wish there were easy answers for life's toughest
problems. Unfortunately, sex therapists have promised a quick
behavioral cure, hypnotists have claimed success through post-hypnotic
suggestion, and doctors have prescribed pills that are hyped
as the "magic bullet". The reality is, some men do well with
sex therapy, others really do not learn what they should have
learned. Hypnosis might certainly help a man relax, which is
important in learning control, but there is more to mastering
the reflex than just relaxation. Some men respond to the medications
being prescribe, but the effect wears off for some, others experience
no change, and some temporarily lose their ability to ejaculate
at all. Some men have even reported that the medication interferes
with their ability to obtain an erection.
Unfortunately,
the men who have been ejaculating within seconds for the past
thirty years are probably reaching orgasm too quickly to have
time to begin practicing what needs to be practiced. For these
men, the medication might be one of the first things to tried.
The good news is that any negative side effects only last as
long as the man is taking the drug. The bad new is that any
positive side effects also only last as long as the man is taking
the drug! Unless a man is willing to take a medication for as
long as he wishes to sexual, he should not look at the drug
as a "cure." For some it will allow a man time to relax, worry
less, and work on the things he must work on to learn effective
control.
From
the site- The American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors
and Therapists (AASECT)
you can request the names of qualified sex therapists practicing
in your geographic area. If you are uncertain about what sex
therapy is, go to my page which offers an Introduction to Sex
Therapy. Many men will want to try on their own before investing
time and money in seeing a therapist.
The
following are items that we offer that focus on ejaculation
control-
Movies
Our Low Price-
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sexuality expert, Dr. Jean-Yves Desjardins provide total
ejaculation control for longer sex. Discover the easy-to-learn
and scientifically-proven methods to increase your partner's
pleasure and build her arousal so she may reach a fully
satisfying orgasm. This
world-class program includes a unique combination of techniques
that teach a man a blend of modern and ancient secrets
about how to control his breath, how to properly position
his body and how to maintain the pace of his lovemaking
until the desired moment of orgasm is achieved.
Time:
30
Min.
You
Can Last Longer (DVD)
$24.99 Running
Time: 55 Minutes Studio:
Sinclair Institute
More
than five million men reach orgasm sooner than they or
their partners would like. Fortunately, almost all of
them can learn simple methods to achieve greater ejaculatory
control. While Dr. Derek C. Polonsky and sex therapist
Marian E. Dunn walk you through the mechanics, real couples
demonstrate in explicit detail the step-by-step self-help
techniques most prescribed by sex therapists. The
Stop/Start Technique and the Squeeze Technique, for example,
have been proven to be 90% effective. Explicit sexual
content.
eBooks
Our Low Price-
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178 pages
The Ultimate Ecstatic Solution to Premature
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to prevent premature ejaculation forever naturally with
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Our Low Price-
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Male
Sexual Endurance By
Robert W. Birch, Ph.D Dr.
Birch graphically portrays the positions of intercourse
in which ejaculatory control can best be practiced. No
other book on the market addresses the issue of coital
positioning as a factor in prolonging mutual sexual pleasure
during intercourse. This book is not just about premature
ejaculation and ejaculatory control. It is also about
effective sexual communication, joyful sexual caress,
and playful erotic experimentation. Within these pages,
there are messages to be learned that will be good for
a lifetime.
Products
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Hitachi Magic Wand
May
I just say Mmmmmmm! This is heaven. It is not only great
for pleasuring the clit and vaginal lips, but your anus,
nipples and for men... some like it on their balls, head
and shaft. All right, you can use it everywhere! It is
my favorite toy and if you only get one sex toy your whole
life... get this! Read
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The
Waterdancer
This
quiet little vibrator is great for clitoral and nipple
stimulation. I love it because you can use it in the tub
or when you spray over two cups of female ejaculation!
Gotta have a waterproof toy when that is going on! It
is powerful for a smaller vibrator and I like it better
than the "bullet" and "egg" vibrators.
It's also discreet and great for travel. Definitely a
good choice. Read
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The
Rabbit Habit
This is better than the ever popular Rabbit Pearl because
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it cradles your clit while it stimulates your g-spot.
It is also bendable, rotates and vibrates and is one of
our best sellers as well as a toy many of our customers
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The
Art of Female Ejaculation
I could not help but recommend the
video that I created because I feel it has helped so many
women and their partners. I love when customers eMail
me back and say that it worked for them as if they are
surprised! I know that even people that purchase it are
skeptical that it will work for them until they try the
techniques. I then end up getting hundreds of eMails every
week saying "Wow, it worked!" Obviously this
the best video I can recommend.
Rocky
Road Baton
This is a favorite pyrex glass dildos with many of our
customers because of the handle and the wide head on the
shaft. A wonderfully defined head for a very full sensation,
a bumpy shaft for great stimulation (you really feel it
when it's inside you) and the handle makes it so easy
to manipulate. Great for g-spot and prostate massage and
warms to your body temperature and is washed easily. Read
& See More
The
Essence CD
When my hubby and I first began dating and I was planning
for a romantic night in which we would make love for the
first time, I made sure this was playing in the background.
It made our night together more beautiful and sensual!
Both of us to this day feel ready to whisk one another
into the bedroom every time we hear it!!! This is the
perfect CD to make the mood erotic, sensual, mysterious,
spiritual, and downright spicy! - Lisa
S. Lawless, Ph.D., CEO (Holistic Wisdom Founder) Read
& See More
An
"Overweight" Sex Life Frank
Discussion On Ways To Make It Spectacular!
Lisa
S. Lawless, Ph.D., C.E.O.
Holistic Wisdom Founder
Lisa
S. Lawless, Ph.D., CEO
Member
of American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors,
and Therapists
( AASECT )
The
following article reviews aspects of sexual play and intercourse
for those who are overweight, have partners who are overweight
or are in a partnership where both partners are overweight.
First,
I will review some of the emotional aspects that may present
as challenges and then I will address sexual positions that
have been successful for obese couples and pregnant women.
Self
Esteem Aspects
There
are many overweight people who have a wonderful sense of self
esteem and enjoy a fruitful, creative and pleasureful sex life.
There are also those who struggle with being overweight physically
as well as emotionally.
There
are many reasons why people put on excess weight, from physical
to emotional aspects. Regardless, I want to share with you my
own experience of having been overweight in my life. I struggled
with excess weight (especially after my pregnancy with my son)
and during that time, I really struggled with low self esteem.
From
feeling self conscious of my weight during sex, feeling afraid
to be nude in front of my husband, and even having intense disgust
with my body, I have had to deal with all the possible negative
feelings one can have when it comes to being overweight. Even
with an accepting and loving partner, there is nothing worse
sexually than feeling repulsive during sex as your level of
vulnerability is so high. I can certainly relate to those that
have similar experiences and wanted to let those of you have
feel this way... you are not alone.
Again,
this is not to say that all people that are overweight
feel self conscious about it during sex; but those with self
esteem issues that tie into their weight most certainly do and
I did not want to neglect this aspect as it can be a terribly
painful challenge to work through.
What
I have known for a long time and had to work hard to actually
embrace as a reality is to know that our worth is not dictated
by our appearance. What I mean, is that while I have always
felt accepting of other people and have deep empathy and compassion,
I have struggled in providing that to myself. I felt that when
I was overweight, that I was not as worthy of love and respect
from myself or others as when I was thin. I knew this was irrational,
yet emotionally it was difficult to escape feeling that way.
Stereotypes
of overweight people are often bullshit. Sorry for being so
blunt, but it's true! Overweight people are NOT lazy, they are
NOT less intelligent, they are NOT always jolly. They ARE the
same inside as those who are thin and ARE just as sexual as
anyone else. They are beautiful human beings no matter what
society tries to dictate.
I
feel strongly that no matter your weight, sex can be beautiful,
sensual and even healing. What the numbers say on the scale
is not measurement of self worth and whether you want to lose
weight, or stay the way your are, great sex always comes down
to embracing the beauty in ourselves and with our partner(s).
Loving ourselves for who we are, as we are in each moment.
Sounds
great right? Yes, I think so, but sometimes not so easy to feel
inside. For a long time I struggled to get my body back in shape
and to lose weight. I tried many diets, learned a great deal
about nutrition, exercise and even went to group therapy for
people who struggle with eating disorders (as I have struggled
with eating as a means to nurture myself through overeating
and then starving myself from guilt).
After
a few years of struggling with my emotional connection with
food I finally figured out the perfect diet, lost weight and
was able to feed my need for nurturing without excess food.
The diet? Love... self love. I realized that until I was able
to accept myself no matter what, whether I was overweight, had
a terrible accident was disfigured or had the privilege to grow
old and watch my body deteriorate over time... I would never
know what it was to be happy.
Since
that time, I have have steadily provided myself with more acceptance,
and compassion. I have forgiven myself for not being perfect
and allowed myself to experience life as the messy, challenging,
exhilarating, beautiful roller coaster that it is. True, some
days I still stumble over self esteem and even find myself thinking
that eating an entire bag of cookies would be nice. We all have
those days. It is how we handle things on a long term basis.
It is a daily commitment to a lifestyle of loving ourselves
to do what will ultimately make us happy, healthy and able to
achieve our dreams.
No
matter what we struggle with, it is our perception of ourselves
that creates our reality, and when we perceive ourselves as
unworthy of love, ugly, or even inadequate than we create a
life where we never fully live. That is why we must first begin
with loving ourselves no matter our shape, size, or appearance.
We are all beautiful human beings, we all deserve love.
Taking
Care of Yourself Regardless of Weight
Certainly
being overweight can increase one's risk of disease and being
extremely overweight can make the risks even higher. Whether
one wishes to stay overweight, lose weight or even gain weight
it is important to provide your body with the nutrients it needs
through a diet rich in vitamins, minerals via water consumption,
vegetables, fruits, protein and whole grains. In addition, getting
adequate physical activity, stress reduction activities (such
as meditation) and sleep are not only ways to maintain health
no matter your weight, but also keep your sex life robust and
pleasureful.
Everything
is interconnected and thus you really cannot ignore the importance
of taking care of yourself on all levels. That is why I focus
on providing information and resources for your body, mind and
spirit. For when one aspect of your life is out of whack, it
will affect other aspects of your life, and often this includes
your sex life.
Sex
In The Real World: Anxiety
In
the real
world, sex is often accompanied by anxiety. Even if it only
occurs infrequently everyone at one time or another has experienced
fear of rejection, fear of not meeting their partner's expectations,
and fear of not being able to perform as these are among the
most common emotional barriers to sex. Anxiety can impede or
disable sexual performance and many
overweight people suffer all these problems amplified by their
excess weight.
Again,
I am not saying that all overweight people are uncomfortable
with their excess pounds, I am merely presenting some of the
obstacles for those whom ARE uncomfortable with being overweight
may experience.
Weight
Gain & Dieting
When
one gains weight they may find that due to the chemical changes
in the body their sex drive or functioning is reduced. This
may occur to lowered self esteem and poor body image due to
the weight gain as well which in turn can lower sex drive and
performance. However,
keep in mind that most overweight people do just fine when it
comes to their sex drive and ability.
If
there are challenges-
Women
may find that they will skip periods on their menstrual cycle
and find that sex is more stressful than pleasurable the more
weight they gain. Men
may find that they have difficulty maintaining an erection and
have difficulty getting full penetration due to a larger waist
line. Weight
loss certainly aids these issues, but be warned with fad diets
as "yo-yo" dieting (loosing and regaining weight repetitively)
may also cause physical problems that affect sexual drive and
functioning as well.
See
our nutritional supplements that aid in WEIGHT
LOSS.
Many
obese persons attempt to hide their bodies under cover of darkness,
or keep their clothes on during sexual intimacy. The concept
of being sexually undesirable is a strong influence in many
cultures and may create a strong feeling of wanting to hide.
Apart
from agonizing experiences of rejection, some overweight people
experience a lowering of expectations. Women in particular often
have strong feelings in this area as if they feel they are risking
too much rejection by even contemplating a relationship with
the sort of person they want for a partner.
Men
may also experience these concerns, however it is often seen
more commonly in women as statistically obese men typically
have less opportunity for sexual interaction and their excess
weight may keep them out of the sexual arena for many years.
These
self deprecating situations can be broken by acquiring self-esteem
and confidence in life and specifically in sexuality regardless
of weight loss.
Physical Challenges
Obstacles
from size issues such as a large belly or lack of flexibility
and cardiovascular endurance can be aided by finding comfortable
sexual positions as well as creative and proactive approaches
to sex.
If
two obese people are coupled, intercourse may prove to be challenging,
but nonetheless it is not only possible, but can be wonderfully
satisfying. Obesity
is rarely, if ever, a barrier to intercourse. Fat is never stored
in the penis, nor does it choke off access to the ovaries (as
Hippocrates taught, and generations of physicians believed).
In
fact, the human body is remarkably well-designed for storing
fat in large quantities. Mother Nature keeps fat away from the
vital and sensory organs, away from the joints, and away from
the genitals.
Sexual
Positions For Obese Couples
MALE
ON TOP/UPRIGHT-
The
"missionary position" can be challenging but certainly
not impossible. To make it easier, I recommend using pillows
to help lift an overweight woman to tilt her pelvis upward and
make it easier to access. Also, she may find it helpful to lie
on her back, her legs bent at the hips, her thighs open as wide
as possible, and her knees fully bent, thus completely exposing
her vulva and vagina.
If she has a big tummy, she can lift it away from her pubic
region with both hands, at least until the man gets himself
positioned between her thighs. If penetration is still difficult,
it can help to put one or more pillows under her bottom.
If
you use a pillow or Liberator
Shape™, your vagina becomes elevated and entry
is easier. If you use two pillows, entry will not only be easy,
it will be different. If you raise your legs to a certain height,
the angle of penetration and the points of friction will be
different than if you raise your legs to another height, or
if you do not raise them at all. You would be amazed at the
variations three inches up or down can create.
When
a woman is overweight it makes more sense for the man to kneel
rather than lay on top during intercourse.
When
the man is overweight it may be preferable to raise your body
high enough - or lift your abdomen with your hands, if necessary
- so that your partner can guide the penis to its destination.
This will be a little easier if the woman places a pillow beneath
her buttocks. Also, try not to initially drop your full weight
on your partner. Rather, prop yourself up with your hands rather
than your elbows, and lower yourself gradually.
At
the first indication that your weight is uncomfortable for her,
raise yourself again. Most women, even the smallest and most
fragile-looking, can support a good deal more weight than you
would suppose.
Drawbacks
to this position are usually pulmonary. An obese woman may find
it difficult to breathe while lying flat on her back, and an
obese
man my find it difficult to catch his breath
while doing the work of lovemaking for an extended period of
time. In such cases, a couple can follow the same "stop-and-start"
method advised for men with premature ejaculation problems.
The "stop-and-start" method is when a man first stimulates the
woman to orgasm without intercourse. The couple then has intercourse
in the female-dominant position, and finally in the male-dominant
position. As this last is usually the most stimulating position
for the male, he is likely to finish before either partner runs
out of air.
FEMALE-DOMINANT
POSITION-
This
position comes highly recommended for obese men, or where both
partners are obese. Among its many benefits is the
ease with which it permits touching, stroking, and caressing
of almost the entire body. The man lies on his back, with his
legs straight, or knees slightly bent. If he has a large abdominal
area, he can lift it up with both hands, as the woman straddles
over him with her knees bent, facing him. She can thus easily
slide his erect penis into her vagina and start her pelvic thrusts
either alone or in conjunction with his.
FEMALE
DOMINANT, BACK TO FRONT-
When
both partners have particularly large tummies, the dominant
woman can face her partner's feet. The man lies on his back
and the woman straddles him with her back facing his front.
She then inserts his penis into her vagina from the rear.
The
problem here is that the woman may have to stay in a crouching
posture for quite some time before the man adjusts himself to
the angle of penetration. With patience this can be a satisfying
angle. When penetration has occurred, he can push his belly
up before she sits completely, then he can rest on her behind.
REAR
ENTRY POSITION-
Also
known as "doggie style," this position has long been advocated
a good position for obese couples. Rear entry is not without
its drawbacks, however. If the man's penis is particularly short,
or if the woman's internal anatomy is positioned at an unusual
angle, it may be literally impossible for a couple to copulate
from the rear. It can also be hard on a obese woman's knees
if not on a bed. Nevertheless, many couples swear by it, and
the size of a woman's buttocks and thighs doesn't seem to affect
the matter.
The
woman kneels on the bed with her legs slightly apart, and lowers
her chest so that her behind is elevated. By kneeling behind
her, and holding his stomach up with his hand at the same time,
the man can readily insert his penis from the rear. He can also
rest his abdomen on the woman's buttocks to make it easier for
him to continue his sexual thrusts throughout intercourse.
SIM'S
POSITION-
This
position, named after a famous surgeon-gynecologist, is a modified
rear-entry position for instances where the woman is obese and
the man is not. The woman begins by lying on one side as she
draws her upper leg upward so that the knee of the upper leg
is opposite the hip of her lower leg.
This
position makes her vagina readily accessible from slightly above
and behind. The man kneels behind her, with one knee on each
side of her straight leg, and makes entry from the rear at a
slight sideward angle. If necessary, he can raise his body slightly
by means of a pillow below each knee.
UPSIDE-DOWN POSITION-
Lying
down on your side, turn yourself around so that your partner's
head is at your feet, and vice versa. Then shift slowly until
your genitals are aligned. This way, you can completely avoid
belly-to-belly contact.
T-SQUARE
POSITION-
Another
effective position is the 'T-square' technique where the woman
is on her back with her legs spread wide apart. Her partner
lies with his hips under the arch formed by her raised legs.
With both abdomens safely out of the way, penis and vagina have
a clear field for fun.
X POSITION-
A
modified T-square, the X position is when the woman lies on
her back with her legs bent at the hips and her thighs spread
as wide as possible. After the penis is inserted into the vagina,
the woman then brings both legs together, while the man swings
his body in either direction 45 degrees, thus forming a large
X. The woman should contract the muscles of her vagina during
this maneuver to avoid the possibility of the penis slipping
out.
STAND
AND DELIVER-
Sometimes
an obese couple needs to have intercourse at a greater-than
ninety degree angle in order to keep their abdomens out of the
way. The woman in this position is semi-reclining across the
edge of a low bed or a padded table, two chairs supporting the
feet, and the man kneeling or standing in front of her. She
can also lie face up over the edge of the bed and he can stand
or kneel.
When
the man is obese and the woman isn't, the man can lie face up
over the edge of the bed with his legs together and his feet
touching the floor. He can also place a pillow under the small
of his back for support. The woman then stands astride him close
to the edge of the bed, and thus is able to make contact with
his erect penis.
Either
way, with one partner standing and the other lying over the
edge of the bed, the standing partner has a lot of options for
adjusting the angle of approach. The more furniture, the more
options.
Rear
entry is often facilitated when both partners are standing (the
woman can rest her arms and/or torso on the bed).
CHAIR
SUPPORT-
Whether
both partners are obese or the female is pregnant, this is a
good way to have sex. Place two chairs with the seats facing
the side of the bed. The woman can then lay on her back with
a pillow under her head for support. She then places one foot
on each chair allowing her partner to penetrate her by standing
up. It may help to place a pillow under her behind if the partner
is tall or for a better angle.
ORAL
SEX-
It
is important to note that sometimes women or men who who feel
bad about their overweight bodies may often put themselves in
the position of constantly being the giver. This can be seen
in cases where oral sex is performed by the overweight partner
with low self esteem while they discourage their partner from
performing it on them.
Oral
sex, like any other sexual act-including the sharing of food-should
be an occasion for mutual pleasure, not a means of gaining worth
by simply giving and not receiving.
Positioning
is not generally a problem in oral sex, although the "69"
position is generally quite challenging if not risking suffocation.
ASSISTED
INTERCOURSE-
King
Edward VII used an adjustable bed (built rather like an examining
table) in order to find the best sexual positions to accommodate
his own bulk and that of his partners. A certain enormous 17th-century
Cardinal is famous for having installed a system of slings and
pulleys over his bed so that he could enjoy near-weightless
sex with a young mistress. The possibilities appear limited
only by one's imagination, one's budget, and one's sense of
modesty.
SEXUAL
PLAY WITHOUT INTERCOURSE-
One
can do amazing things with a properly trained set of fingers.
Some men swear that the sensation of having the penis fondled
by a woman's breast cleavage is the closest thing to heaven
on earth. One thing to keep in mind is that obese women may
have "cleavage" or rolls of fat that may provide creative
play.
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Help
Support Sexual Health Educators Donate
To Our Holistic Wisdom Legal Aid Support Fund
Lisa
S. Lawless, Ph.D., C.E.O.
After
learning of the Joanne
Web case we decided to start a charity department that will
provide adult businesses and individuals like Joanne that need
funds to pay for all of the legal costs that come with such
ridiculous and unconstitutional legal battles.
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This
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General
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This
section is for sexual current events and news;
allowing our web site visitors to hear sex news
around the world.
Man Admits Guilt In Removing Genitals
A former church minister and Boy Scout leader cut off
another man's genitals in a makeshift gender reassignment
surgery in a hotel room. He has pleaded guilty to first-degree
assault and practicing medicine without a license.
Jack
Wayne Rogers of Fulton, Missouri, admitted he performed
the grisly operation about two years ago. Circuit Judge
Gary Oxenhandler sentenced Wayne to 17 years in prison
for assault and seven years for the illegal surgery. The
prison time is to run concurrently with a 30-year sentence
handed to him in April after he pleaded guilty to child
pornography and obscenity charges.
Wayne
had made an agreement with Michael Abercrombie that he'd
remove his genitals in a four-hour operation. That time
passed, complications developed and bleeding refused to
stop. Michael, now known as Madison, says she didn't feel
like a victim at first, but changed her mind after prosecutors
presented her Wayne's checkered criminal history, peppered
with allegations of cannibalism and a pornography collection
that included photographs of severed genitals.
"I
didn't know his motivation when I went into it,'' she
said. ``I was under a lot of emotional stress, and it
seemed like there was no alternative.'' Madison must now
go through additional surgeries to complete her gender
reassignment.
Wayne
is still being investigated in the torture and killing
of a Skidmore man by the name of Branson Kayne Perry,
20, who disappeared in April 2001. A police search of
Wayne's property turned up a necklace belonging to the
man. Wayne has denied killing Perry and has not been charged.
Women Molested After Giving Birth
Seven women who had just given birth at a Southern California
hospital were molested by a lab technician over the course
of two days. The women complained that a hospital lab
technician groped their breasts or vaginas under the pretext
of conducting postpartum examinations in their rooms.
One
of the victims said that a lab tech had come in under
the guise of coming in to draw blood and basically started
talking to her about her medical condition, how she was
feeling and that led to a breast examination. In one other
case, it led to him doing an actual vaginal examination.
One of the women became suspicious and reported the incident
to another staff member at Garden Grove Hospital.
Hugh Hefner Inducted Into The Erotic Hall Of Fame
The
Godfather of Playboy was honored as the first inductee
into the Erotic
Museum of Hollywood's Hall of Fame for being "one
of the most democratizing forces in sexuality in the last
century,'' according to the museum. "Hugh Hefner's
brand of preened perfection became the standard of beauty
for a nation,'' the museum stated on its Web site.
Hefner
donated some artifacts to his exhibit, which were unveiled
in a ceremony hosted by comedian Bill
Maher. The museum has a pair of Hugh's pajamas,
slippers, a pipe and a bunny costume.
Man Attempts To Sue Wife For 5 Sexless
Days
A Spanish middle-aged
man from Seville -- the city of Don Juan and Carmen,
tried to have his wife charged with
domestic abuse because she refused to have sex with him
on five consecutive days. He claims her refusals amounted
to "degrading treatment" and domestic abuse, a term used
more often to describe wife-battering. The judge tossed
the case.
Ahh-nold Bans Sex With Corpses
Arnold Schwarzenegger has terminated the rights of necrophiliacs
in the California. Starting now, it's officially illegal
to have sex with a dead body. The law stems from several
cases of necrophilia in the state over the past several
years, in which police could not charge the offender with
a crime. If you get caught, the new law puts you in the
"Big House" for up to 8 years.
Low Sperm Count With Frequent Ejaculations
You already knew that. But there's more. According to
a study published in Fertility and Sterility by Dr. Elisabeth
Carlsen of Copenhagen's Rigshospitalet. Here are some
more interesting facts on male ejaculation-
~
Men ejaculate
more frequently in the spring than in the winter.
~
The
seasons don't lead to changes in sperm count, motility
(movement) or shape.
~
Sperm
count falls about 29% with two ejaculations a week and
falls 41% with
three ejaculations.
~
Ejaculating
frequently doesn't have an effect on motility or shape.
Divorce Predictions?
New research shows certain relationship skills or the
lack of them can predict whether two people are headed
for marital bliss or a painful breakup. The skills that
predicted success will come as no surprise to marriage
therapists or happily married couples.
The
ones who stayed happily married were likely to handle
conflict constructively. Even
in the midst of a difficult issue in their relationship,
they were likely to treat each other with respect. Those
headed for divorce were more likely to make negative comments
about the relationship or the partner. Couples
who ended up divorced viewed each others' communication
more negatively. It wasn't that the couples who are happy
never undermined or insulted their partners, they just
did it less.
The
findings are actually good news, because the lack of skills
leading up to unhappiness and divorce can be dealt with
in counseling.
John
F. Kennedy said it best: The time to repair the roof is
when the sun is shining. Attending to our relationships
now, today, is essential if we want them to remain strong
into the future."
16 Year Old Girl Hung For Sex
In the city of Neka in Iran, Atefeh Rajabi was charged
and found guilty of "acts incompatible with chastity."
The judge in the Islamic court ruled that the appropriate
penalty was death. That's right: death. Her sentence was
confirmed by Iran's Supreme Court.
On
August 15, the 16-year-old girl was hung from a crane
in the main square of Neka, in full public view, in order
to keep "society safe from acts against public morality".
Sharia
law, the Islamic code which is supposed to govern punishments
in Iran, states that unmarried people who have sex should
be punished with 100 lashes. That was the chastisement
meted out to the single man with whom Atefeh was accused
of "committing acts incompatible with chastity".
Married
women who have sexual relations with someone who is not
their husband should, according to Sharia, be stoned to
death - although Iran's chief justice, apparently revolted
by the cruelty of pelting women with rocks, ruled two
years ago that stonings should be abandoned.
Hanging
is not prescribed for either category of transgressor.
So what was the judge (Haji Rezaie) doing sentencing an
"unchaste" 16-year-old to hang? He said that she had a
"sharp tongue" and had "undressed in court". It seems
that all she did was to take off her headscarf and insist
that she was the victim of an older man's advances: but
even if she had stripped naked and called the judge a
fat ignorant bastard, those actions would hardly merit
death, even under Islamic law.
Nevertheless,
the judge was so outraged that he decided he would personally
put the noose round the child's neck. Amnesty International
issued a statement expressing outrage at the execution
(the tenth of a child in Iran since 1990) - but no British
newspaper or television station has reported this.
What
would be headline news if it happened in America (can
you imagine the response if a 16-year-old girl was executed
for having sex in Texas?) is, because it happens in an
Islamic state, apparently it doesn't count.
Atefeh
we are sorry that you saw such little humanity in your
16 years of life. May you now have peace and may your
judge Haji
Rezaie know his karmic duty to learn why what he has done
is against all acts of decency.
Sexy Offensive Candy Reports A Hoax
Remember
last week's story about the St. Blasien Jesuit College
students who wrote to the manufacturer of Maoam candies
about the "the shameless presentation of sexual practices
on the wrapping?"
It
got a lot of press in Germany. And now it turns out to
be a well-executed prank by the very same students at
St. Blasien. The publicity was a big PR boost for the
candy's manufacturer. As for the students . . . "They
never thought anybody in their right mind would take it
seriously," said Assistant Headmaster Ralph Mertens.
We Like Our Look In Others
According to a study published in the UK's Journal of
the Royal Society, you're more likely to respond positively
to someone who resembles you. Dr. Lisa DeBruine of Canada's
McMaster University showed male and female subjects a
variety of faces - some that were computer manipulated
to look slightly like them, and others that were not.
Both men and women liked the faces that resembled their
own. Dr. DeBruine theorizes that we may have evolved to
place greater trust in people who look like us because
the chances are higher that they share the same genes
as we do. By the same token, her research shows that men
and women don't respond sexually to faces that resemble
theirs. That, suggests Dr. DeBruine, may be because if
they share some of our genes, sexually bonding with them
could cause inbreeding.
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