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Exercises For Delayed Ejaculation

Dr. Lisa Lawless

Dr. Lisa Lawless, CEO of Holistic Wisdom
Clinical Psychotherapist: Relationship & Sexual Health Expert

fire hose, water stream, mastering ejaculation

Ejaculation Mastery

The average length of time couples has sex range between 33 seconds to 44 minutes, with an average of 5.4 minutes. Factors that can impact how soon a man ejaculates are both psychological and biological factors.

Ejaculation Challenges

For men who struggle with ejaculation psychologically, factors such as sexual abuse, poor body image, guilt, shame, depression, and other mental health challenges can play a role. Relationship-based issues such as power struggles, anger, fear of intimacy, and being in a toxic relationship can also impact sexual functioning. See our Relationship Guides for helpful information regarding these issues.

Physically, men can have abnormal hormone levels that may require human growth hormone (HGH) therapy, have coronary issues, or have other health problems such as an inflamed prostate (BPH) or urethra that can impact ejaculation. If you have concerns, it is always best to rule out physical issues with your physician or urologist. See our How To Talk To Your Doctor About Sex article for tips on how to bring up the subject.

If you feel that the issues that you are having may be psychological or relationship-based, you may want to seek out getting therapy. See our guides for more insights on this: Types of Therapy and Sex Therapy & Counseling.

Kegel Exercises

Kegel exercises are when you tighten your pelvic floor muscles and hold the contractions to strengthen them. The next time you go to the washroom and begin urinating, try to stop the flow midway. Just as working out your biceps will give you better definition and more strength, the PC muscle can help you strengthen and better define your erections and orgasms. Stopping your urine midstream can help you figure out when using your PC muscle. Try stopping your urination three times to ensure that you understand where the muscle is located. You will also feel your anus contracting.

Exercise 1

Quickly clench and release your PC muscle for 10 seconds. Take a 10-second break. Perform three sets, then take a 30-second break. Clench and unclench for 5 seconds with 5-second breaks, ten times in a row. Tighten your PC muscle for 30 seconds and release for 30 seconds, three times in a row. Repeat the first step, and you're done for the day.

Exercise 2

Tighten your muscle and hold for a count of 5, and release. Repeat ten times. Squeeze and release the muscle ten times quickly. Repeat three times. Tighten and release your PC muscle in long and short intervals for counts of 10. Repeat three times. Squeeze your muscle and hold it for as long as you can. Try to work your way up to 120 seconds (relax, that's only two minutes).

Exercise 3

Thoroughly squeeze and release your muscle over and over again. Begin with one set of 30, and then slowly work your way up to over 100. Squeeze as tightly as possible (make sure it's only your PC muscle that you're clenching). Hold it for 20 seconds, then rest for 30 seconds. Repeat five times.

Exercise 4

Begin squeezing and releasing your muscle for 2 minutes a day and gradually work your way up to doing it for 20 minutes at least three times a day. You should eventually be able to perform at least 200 repetitions per session.

It Takes Repetition

Remember that the results will not be evident the instant you've done your first Kegel exercises. It takes time to begin training regularly like any muscle. Learn more about Kegels through our article: How To Do Kegel Exercise, which has more tips for men and women.

Ancient Chinese Fangzhongshu

Ancient Chinese Fangzhongshu (Sexual Skills and Methods) focuses on the perineum's role by pressing into it to slow and stop ejaculation. This technique involves pressing the front of the anus and perineum and breathing deeply to suppress ejaculation. The focus of this technique is to interrupt ejaculation.

Electrostimulation

There are also electrode options used on the perineum that use electrostimulation to stimulate and confuse the nervous system to delay male ejaculation during sexual intercourse. Pads used on the perineum with TENS units (transcutaneous electrical muscle stimulation devices) effectively prolonged sex. Learn more about this through our Erotic Electrostimulation Guide.

Premature Ejaculation Sex Toys

Sex toys that help with ejaculation include using penis rings with a testicle ring that pulls the testes away from the body, delaying ejaculation. This works because when a man climaxes, his testicles pull up inward toward his body. Holding them away from his body can keep him from ejaculating as easily. In addition, there are masturbation sleeves designed to help with desensitization. See our Penis Rings Guide and Penis Ring Measuring Guide for more helpful information.

Breath Work

Tantric exercises focus on mindful sex where psychological control, breathwork, and physical control are integrated. Getting control over your breath is a vital part of controlling ejaculation. It refocuses you and allows you to relax and slow down. Taking deep breaths will activate your parasympathetic nervous system receptors located deep in your diaphragm, which can aid in calming your body. Also see our Sex & Mindfulness Guide and Tantra & Kama Sutra Tips.

Edging: Stop & Start Method

Edging is a start and stop technique based on Tantra and is simply stimulating yourself until just the point of orgasm and stopping before you climax. Once you calm down, start the stimulation again and repeat this process. Doing this allows you to become more aware of your sexual response and can create neural pathways in your brain that are stronger in controlling your orgasm. It can take a great deal of practice, but it can be highly effective. For more information, also check out our Male Masturbation Tips.

Squeeze Technique

Squeezing the head of your penis for several seconds can keep you from ejaculating. You can do it or have your partner do it to help with ejaculation control.

Use Condoms

Using condoms can reduce sensation, which can also help avoid premature ejaculation. Two types of condoms can assist with premature ejaculation. There are extended pleasure condoms, which tend to be thicker, and delay condoms which tend to be lined with benzocaine or lidocaine to desensitize the penis. 

Desensitizers

There are desensitizing lubricants on the market; however, be aware that many of them contain ingredients that may be harmful to your health. Make sure to see our guide Desensitizing Lubes Guide, for more information before you decide to use them.

Sexual Positions

Sexual positions that pressure your penis can prolong sex, such as the spooning position. Another position is to lie on your back and have your partner be on top.

In Closing

No matter what you choose to try when prolonging and delaying ejaculation, keep in mind that ejaculation is not an indicator of how good a lover you are; rather, it is how attentive you are to your partner's needs. Learn how to be a better lover through our helpful sex education and relationship blogs.

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