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Ways to Soothe & Seduce Your Spirit

When we forget to pamper ourselves and our lover, it greatly impacts our desire to have sex and intimacy. Often times when people look for sex tips they forget to look at the magic that makes it great. That magic is the sense of being carefree and indulging in the relaxation and pleasure... not some task that involves getting fixated on an orgasm, especially if it is only for one partner (most often the male). Women in particular can start to see sex as a chore when they focus on the ejaculation of her male lover and nothing more. Allowing her to get her needs met when it comes to relaxing and being nurtured (not just her own orgasm) is also very important.

Lisa Lawless
By Lisa S. Lawless, Ph.D.
Psychotherapist & Sexuality Expert

CEO & Founder of
Holistic Wisdom, Inc. & NAASAS

Copyright: Holistic Wisdom- Do NOT Copy Warning

Copyright © Holistic Wisdom, Inc.

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Imagine a candle lit room, with sensuous fabrics draping the walls. There is exotic music playing, the atmosphere is enticing and there you are wearing sweats, dry skin, hair a mess, stressed out and ready to sit in front of the television to escape into a vegetative state. Does not fit does it? That is because we often neglect our selves and what really replenishes our spirit and place more importance on making sure our house is clean and other tasks.

Yes, it's true many of us neglect ourselves. I too am guilty of looking and feeling a mess from time to time. With so much to do and so little time, it seems that taking those extra moments to do something nice for ourselves can seem extravagant. I really don't feel my best when I am not doing things over time to pamper myself. Simple things really... like taking a hot bubble bath or slathering myself up in my favorite vanilla scented body lotion. These little things have a strong psychological affect on us.

Studies have shown that using a favorite perfume in the middle of the day actually made workers perform better. Why? Because it refreshed them and gave them a sense of renewed vitality by having a fresh scent to stimulate them. Not to mention the whole area of study of aromatherapy.

If any of you have ever watched a makeover show, isn't it amazing to watch the person not only change physically (new clothes, a haircut, make-up) but also on an emotional and mental level as well? I believe it is when we have the intention of wanting to live a life where we are our 'higher self' when we naturally want to do things for ourselves that provide us with that extra spark of creativity and vitality. Forgetting to do things for ourselves and with our lover such as a relaxing walk or even doing something that brings us laughter can drastically affect our sex lives.

I have always been interested in how people nurture themselves through exercise, good diet, meditation, and even hygiene and pampering. These are important components and when we neglect them, we ultimately do ourselves a disservice. That is why I am always looking for ways to bring products and services to our web site that encourage those things as I feel it is important for people to have these resources.

When we do things like relax over a cup of herb tea, get a manicure, enjoy facials or massage, take hot bubble baths, stretch and massage our feet, hands, etc. we often feel a sense of connecting with ourselves through nurturing. Self love is more important than most people realize... in fact it is my opinion that it is often lack of self love that keeps us from fully realizing how capable we truly are in our own lives. In turn, sharing this with a partner can promote intimacy on a level that brings sex to an amazing level... not because the sex tips were great (although those can be fun) but because the experience was authentic, carefree and loving.

Often times we get overwhelmed by stress, and we forget to appreciate how wonderful it feels to simply enjoy our body, while pleasuring and relaxing our mind and spirit. When we do these things we not only feel good about ourselves, thus affecting our mental and emotional state, but we also exude that energy to others. People will see you as more attractive, confident and sensual when you put energy into yourself.

That is why one of my favorite gifts to give people on holidays and special occasions are things that pamper them such as a visit to a spa, or bath and body products to pamper them. Life is short, so go ahead, relax, have fun, get creative.


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