Sex With Cancer: The Definitive Guide

What We Will Explore

Having sex with cancer or after recovering from cancer can present unique challenges through physical, mental, and emotional changes. This article will address different types of cancer, treatments for cancer, and the overall changes which may affect sexuality and intimate relationships.

Things To Keep In Mind

As you read the following information in this guide, please remember a few things:

• There is no right way for you to enjoy your sexuality. You are a unique individual, and finding a path that is right for you is one of the most essential parts of nurturing yourself.
• If you have people around you that are toxic, emotionally and mentally unhealthy, abusive, or critical, find support elsewhere. There are many support groups and people who understand what you are going through, and you deserve people who will support your needs.
• Always talk with your physician about anything that can impact your health. Never assume that a lubricant, sex toy, or other product is safe for your unique health needs. While we only carry the best body-safe products available, that does not mean that they are suitable for everyone. We provide a lot of health information, but that can never replace you talking to your health care provider who truly knows your medical needs. We understand that talking about sexuality can feel intimidating, but being an advocate for yourself when it comes to your overall health and your sexual health is vital. After all, you deserve the best, and that starts with you making healthy, informed choices that are right for you. For helpful tips on being an advocate on your behalf regarding sexual health, see our guide: How to Talk To Your Doctor About Sex. 
• Sometimes there will be really challenging obstacles physically, mentally, and emotionally. This guide will cover some of those challenges, provide helpful tips, and suggest things you can discuss with a partner, your doctor, or support systems. We truly care about you and want to do everything we can to provide you with as many ideas, resources, and products as possible. If you find that something regarding sex and cancer is not in this guide, don't hesitate to contact us and let us know, as we would love to hear suggestions or questions from you.

Finding Pleasure

We tend to put a lot of pressure on ourselves regarding sex. We also tend to think in conventional ways about how we should derive pleasure from sex. However, when a cancer diagnosis comes into our lives, it can be an opportunity to look for new, creative, and diverse ways of doing things. We can begin to explore outside norms and confinements of how we have defined ourselves, how we have always done things, and even how we receive and give pleasure.

Opening ourselves up to finding new ways to experience intimacy, wholeness, and joy are all part of optimal healing. Allowing ourselves opportunities to move past the things that oppress, repress, and keep us suffering are proactive ways to take back control.

Give yourself new ways to love yourself physically, mentally, and emotionally. If you have a partner, invite them along on this journey into finding joy and pleasure through new experiences. Appreciate that doing things differently can be a passage into self-discovery that many people don't allow themselves to experience.

Mental Health Care

A cancer diagnosis and treatments can cause a lot of distress, and it is not uncommon to feel anxiety, depression, frustration, and simply overwhelmed. Particularly those with aggressive or late-stage cancers may struggle, so it is vital to find ways to nurture not just physically but also through mental health resources to help improve mood, anxiety, and coping skills.

The Cancer Survivors Network (csn.cancer.org) provides various forums that allow patients to connect, and the Cancer Hope Network (cancerhopenetwork.org) can match cancer patients with a survivor or caregiver for peer support. CancerCare.org offers professional counseling services, and the Cancer Support Community (cancersupportcommunity.org) has a helpline that connects patients and caregivers to local resources like support groups, transportation services, and other programs related to finances, housing, and treatment decision-making. If thoughts of suicide are coming up, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-8255 or go to SpeakingOfSuicide.com/resources.

Reproductive Cancers

The cancers that affect sexual health the most impact the reproductive system. Cancer in a woman's reproductive organs is called gynecologic cancer. There are six types: vulvar, cervical, ovarian, uterine, vaginal, and fallopian tube cancer. Some may consider breast cancer to be related. Cancer in men's reproductive organs are prostate, colon, testicle, and penis cancer. These types of cancer can impact sexual functioning more than other types and working with an OB/GYN or urologist may be helpful depending on your needs. In addition to reproductive cancers, we will also be covering the effects that all types of cancer can have on patients and survivors.

Cancer & Libido

Of course, treating cancer after a diagnosis is the primary concern for anyone. Sex may not be a priority for you because of stress as well as issues caused by both the disease and treatment, such as hormonal imbalances, depression, nausea, pain, or fatigue.

Some people find their sex drive goes away or feel negatively about themselves sexually which is quite common. In addition, even if no physical complications impact sexual functioning, most people see some impact from receiving a cancer diagnosis on their sexuality even if it is through stress alone. It is normal to experience changes, even if they are mental and emotional effects.

Because each person's type of cancer and treatment is unique, its impact on your sex life will also vary, as how it will impact your relationships. Some relationships are made strong by a health crisis, while others may feel strained.

The Importance Of Support

One of the most essential support systems you will need when dealing with cancer is that of your health care providers. You will want to find clinicians who will provide you with helpful information, review all of your options, and you may wish to get a second opinion as well. Talking to your health care team about your concerns, plans, and life surrounding your diagnosis can ease your stress levels and make this a less challenging time.

Speaking with supportive family and friends is also a good idea. While some people are very independent and are not as open to asking for help, this is a time to do that. It takes courage to be vulnerable, and to ask for help is a brave thing to do and necessary to take care of yourself.

In addition, seeking our support groups online or in person dealing with your particular cancer diagnosis is also a fantastic way to lessen stress, feel connected, and help provide the support you deserve.

Physical, Mental & Emotional Symptoms

Cancer or its treatment can cause various physical, mental, and emotional issues. Here is a sample of what some of these may be:

• Generalized Feelings Of Being Sick
• Fatigue And/Or Weakness
• Irritability
• Depression
• Anxiety
• Pain
• Bowel And/Or Bladder problems
• Mouth Issues
• Breathing Issues
• Changes To Appearance
• Changes To Sex Hormones

Relationships & Cancer

When You Are In A Relationship

Cancer can elicit changes in a relationship and impact responsibilities, roles, parenting, sexual health, intimacy, and plans for the future. There will be good days and bad, and working through them together can be exhausting to you both. Partners can feel frustrated with the diagnosis as well as one another. You can both feel overwhelmed, and if your relationship was already strained, it could be even more challenging.

When it comes to sex, a low libido can be a normal part of cancer and treatment for it. However, it can also be caused by low-self esteem because of the changes to your body, such as losing hair, weight, and sexual functioning. The role of a caregiver can also be overwhelming. It is one of the most demanding things to care for a sick partner, and intimacy can feel strained. No one enjoys having any of these challenging feelings, but it is vital to acknowledge them and talk openly about them.

In addition to talking honestly with one another, it can also be good to talk about your happier memories, things you love about one another, as well as things you would like to do with one another. You both should also try to seek help through groups, a therapist, or clergy for support for you both. There are a lot of helpful resources for you both during this challenging time.

When You Are Single With Cancer

While it can be helpful to have a partner when you have cancer, sometimes it is easier not to have one, depending on the quality of the relationship. However, if you are single, it can be easier not to have to tell a partner, but it can also make you feel more alone. Making sure to talk to close friends, family members, and possibly people from a support group may be helpful.

Starting A New Relationship

Finding a new partner during cancer treatments or after can feel overwhelming. It may feel difficult to talk about, and there may be changes to your body that are challenging to deal with emotionally. You may also have concerns that sex will be painful or that your new love interest may not be understanding in the way you would like them to be.

While it may be difficult, speaking openly and honestly is the best way to approach this. After all, you deserve someone who will accept you for where your body is now, and you should ensure that you are picking a partner that is worthy of you.

You should be prepared for the possibility that what you share with them may be challenging for them. After all, you have had time to process things for a while, and they have not. Some people are afraid of getting close to someone with cancer as it can make them face their own mortality or bring up concerns about yours. It may take time for them to be comfortable with any challenges or changes to your body that you have gone through.

You may find that you experience rejection, and while that can happen, it is essential to understand that just as you are trying to find something that is right for you, so are they, and if it is not the right fit for both of you it is best that you not waste your time on it.

As your relationship deepens, you may feel more secure and hopefully more comfortable discussing your cancer. Talking to a partner about these things is essential for you to both. A person worthy of you in their lives will be supportive and love you as you are.

Relationships With Advanced Or Terminal Cancer

Whatever your prognosis, you will still have needs and desires, and it is ok to want sex, intimacy, and connection with others. Physical touching and sharing your feelings with someone can be comforting, and you are deserving of it. If you do not have a partner, make sure to connect with close friends and family and seek support from others that are going through what you are through support groups.

Seek Out Support

Whether you have a neighbor help out with your lawn or a friend help with cooking, there are many ways people can help you through this, so don't be afraid to receive the care you deserve during your time of need.

Sex & Cancer For Women

The following are possible challenges from cancer treatments that can sexually affect a woman with cancer or who is recovering from it:

Early Menopause

Menopause begins once a woman stops menstruating and can no longer have children. The average age for menopause is 51; however, it can happen anytime between the 40s through the 50s. Cancer treatments may cause early menopause. These cancer treatments include:

• Chemotherapy
• Hormone Therapy
• Surgery That Removes The Ovaries (Oophorectomy)
• Pelvic Radiotherapy

Learning your cancer treatment will cause you to go into early menopause can be physically and emotionally overwhelming. It can cause more severe menopausal symptoms and leave you without the option of having a child in the future. This loss of fertility can be quite difficult even if you were not planning on having a child in the future. Make sure to acknowledge this as a loss and honor your grieving process through support and nurturing yourself. 

You may be able to opt for hormone replacement therapy (HRT) to help relieve symptoms as it can replace female sex hormones, but it is not suitable for all cancers, such as breast cancer. HRT often does provides women with a boost in sex drive so if it interests you explore this option with your doctor.

Hormone Therapy

Hormone therapy for cancer can slow down or stop the growth of cancer. It is used in hormone-sensitive cancers such as breast, ovarian and uterine cancer. These hormone treatments can cause fatigue, hot flashes, vaginal discharge or dryness, and decreased sexual interest. They may also cause an early onset of menopause. Make sure to get rest and find ways to make yourself more comfortable during this time.

Breast Surgery

While breast surgery may not impact your ability to have sex, it can impact how you feel about your sexuality. Surgery and radiotherapy often cause some loss of feeling in the affected breast(s). This can also affect self-esteem, sexual desire, and your ability to become aroused. Feelings of loss after the surgery are quite common. In addition, seeing your body with scarring can feel emotionally overwhelming. You may also worry about what your partner or a future partner will think.

You may prefer that a doctor or nurse be with you when you first see your post-surgical scars so that they can explain how the swelling and bruising will diminish and walk you through what you can expect over time. You can also discuss the possibility of breast reconstruction if that is something you are considering.

There is no correct way to handle dealing with breast surgery, and you may need time to emotionally heal in addition to your physical recovery. You may need time to be seen by a partner. Take your time and do what is right for you.

You can try massaging your breast area to get reacquainted with your body again when you are ready. Doing this alone before sharing your body with a partner may be a practical option, but if it feels more comfortable to be nurtured by a partner during this, that can also be a good option. The key is nurturing yourself through this process in whatever way you require.

If you feel insecure at first about exposing your breast area, you can wear a bra or camisole during sexual activity to help with your sense of sexual confidence. However, don't feel you need to cover up if comfortable with it.

After A Mastectomy

A mastectomy is the surgical removal of one or both breasts, either partially or completely. When you have had to go through a mastectomy, it can take months to feel physically normal and sometimes longer to emotionally and mentally adjust. Most cancer patients who have gone through this procedure struggle with feeling less attractive, less sexual, and worry that a partner will no longer feel the same way about them. Part of the healing process is about learning to accept and appreciate your new body, which includes the same for partners.

It can be helpful to lean on support groups, friends, and family during this time. Finding help with buying clothes or bras and exploring options to feel better about your body image, such as using breast prostheses (prosthetic breasts) or having reconstructive surgery, can be helpful to some.

Breast cancer surgery can reduce sensation in the nipples and the entire breast area even if reconstruction surgery is performed. Communication with a partner, if you have one, will be vital to helping you feel more comfortable and less self-conscious.

If you need to, you may want to seek a counselor to help you process all of your emotions about this process. Most importantly, be patient with yourself. If it’s affecting a relationship you may be in, consider couples counseling or exploring your life without a partner.

It is entirely normal to go through a grieving process; however, should you begin to feel worthless and depressed where it is difficult to manage your life, you may be going through severe depression, and you might benefit from reaching out to a therapist to help you reconnect with the beautiful person you are.

Pelvic & Genital Surgeries

Surgery may be required for cancer treatment to the reproductive organs, including vulvar, cervical, ovarian, uterine, vaginal, and fallopian tube surgeries. This may cause changes to sexual functioning, including vaginal dryness shrinking or shortening the vagina, and possible changes to the sensation of an orgasm. In the case of vulvar surgery, where the clitoris has to be removed, a woman may not be able to achieve orgasm. To better understand the role of the clitoris, see our Clitoris Guide.

Scar tissue from surgery can make having penetrative sex uncomfortable or even painful. Your doctor may recommend using a dilator. We recommend using dilators with tapered, curved ends with easy-to-hold handles. Please see our Dilators as we have more advanced and newer versions than most clinics. Also, see our guide regarding Painful Sex.

Pelvic Radiotherapy

Radiotherapy uses radiation to kill cancer cells for cervical, vulval, vaginal, and anal cancers. If ovarian transposition is an option, they may be able to do laparoscopic surgery (using small incisions with the aid of a camera) to avoid damaging the ovaries. If the ovaries are affected, it can cause early menopause.

During radiotherapy, the mucous membrane inside the vagina can also become thin and easily damaged, leading to pain during sex. Sometimes chemotherapy is combined with radiotherapy (chemoradiotherapy), making the vaginal area even more tender. It is best to avoid vaginal sex during either of these treatments. Pelvic radiotherapy can cause fibrosis that narrows the vagina; using a dilator for 2 to 8 weeks after recovery can help.

It has been undetermined whether cancer treatments, such as chemotherapy, can be passed to a partner through vaginal secretions. Thus during treatment, if sexual activity does occur, using a dental dam (oral sex) or condoms (sexual intercourse) is often advised.

Chemotherapy

Chemotherapy can make you feel fatigued, sick, or have a sore mouth. It can also cause hair loss, sensitivity to touch, impact fertility and could harm a developing fetus. It is generally recommended that if sexually active, a woman use contraception to prevent pregnancy during treatment and for a period afterward.

Having sex during chemo can be safe, but it is something that you should review with your physician because when your white blood cell count is low (neutropenia), you are at increased risk of infection. You may also have an increased risk of bleeding when you have a low platelet level (thrombocytopenia). When these types of health conditions are going on, you may want to avoid intense sex that may provide a high level of friction because it can increase your risks of infection, bleeding, and bruising.

Vaginal Stenosis

Cancer treatments such as radiation and surgery can cause vaginal stenosis, which is when scar tissue builds up in the vagina, causing it to become more narrow or short. In addition, the lining of the vagina can become more dry and thin. Using ample healthy lubricants, doing Kegel exercises with or without Kegel weights, and using a dilator are typically recommended, but check with your physician to see if there are other options that they can suggest. 

Learn more through our related guides, How To Do Kegel Exercises, and How To Use Kegel Weights.

After A Hysterectomy

If you have had surgery to remove your uterus, cervix, ovaries, Fallopian tubes, and/or other surrounding structures, you may experience numbness, pain, and bleeding during sexual activity after healing. Talk with your doctor about lubrication, dilators, Kegel exercises and seek out support. Also, make sure to communicate with a partner if you have one about the physical, emotional, and mental challenges that surround this and how you can work through them together. Take the time you need to be healthy on every level and nurture yourself. You have earned it.

Sex & Cancer For Men

The following are possible challenges from cancer treatments that can sexually affect a man with cancer or who is recovering from it:

Sperm Banking

Some cancer treatments can impact fertility, such as some forms of chemotherapy, radiotherapy, removal of the testicles, and some types of prostate surgery. Discussions with your doctor about the possibility of sperm banking should be discussed prior to treatment.

Sperm banking is the collection and storage of semen to harvest sperm for future impregnation. The sperm is frozen and stored until you decide to have a baby. Some forms of cancer may impact the quality of your sperm, and your samples should be checked at the time of collection to see if they are viable. Even if your sperm count is low, intracytoplasmic sperm injection (ICSI), where an egg is fertilized in a test tube, can be used. If cancer prevents you from giving a sample via the penis, sperm can be extracted directly from the testicles.

Erectile Dysfunction (ED)

Some cancer treatments can cause ED, which can be addressed in various ways. Please see our Erectile Dysfunction Guide for more information on the available treatment options and discuss them and possibly others with your doctor based on your personal health needs.

After Prostate Cancer

How you recover after prostate cancer ultimately depends on the cancer treatment that you have received. If you have had to have hormone therapy, radiation, surgery, chemotherapy, you will want to discuss a treatment plan for your recovery. This can involve using penis pumps, penis rings, and other helpful sex toys and medical devices to help you recover.

Hormone Therapy

Hormone therapy for men is primarily used to treat prostate cancer and is used to block or stop testosterone which can promote the growth of cancer cells. This may cause low libido, erectile dysfunction, hot flashes, and fatigue.

Radiotherapy

Radiotherapy to the pelvic area can be done externally or internally (brachytherapy) for prostate and bladder lower bowel cancers. Radiotherapy performed close to the testicles may lower your production of testosterone.

Radiotherapy may cause painful ejaculations, erectile dysfunction, and low libido. It may be best to avoid sexual activity if it is painful. During internal radiotherapy for prostate cancer, a condom should be used if sexually active. There may be a chance that a radioactive metal seed could travel from your prostate gland into your partner through ejaculation.

Pelvic & Genital Surgery

Surgery may be required to treat cancer of the prostate, bowels, bladder, penis, testicles, and abdominal lymph nodes. Surgery to the prostate, penis, and testicles can impact fertility, erections, the ability to ejaculate, and more. Discussions with your doctor about fertility options before surgery may be preferred. In the case of penis surgery, penile reconstruction (phalloplasty) may be an option.

If you have your prostate removed, you will still be able to have an orgasm, but you will no longer be able to ejaculate, and you will have what is called a dry orgasm. Some men say that dry orgasms feel normal or even better than before prostatectomy, while others say it is less pleasurable.

As a result of radical prostatectomy to treat prostate cancer, some men can experience climacturia, which is urinary incontinence, which can happen at the moment of sexual climax. If you have a radical prostatectomy, you should ask your surgeon about nerve-sparing surgery. Nerve-sparing surgery is only appropriate for men with early prostate cancer that has not spread into nerve bundles. Studies show that of the men who did not get nerve-sparing surgery, only 60.8% could have orgasms after recovery; however, 90.7% of men who got it were able to orgasm.

Abdominal surgery to remove the lymph nodes is called a retroperitoneal lymph node dissection which may be performed to treat testicular cancer or other cancer that has spread to these lymph nodes. This may cause retrograde ejaculation, which is when your semen and sperm go into the bladder instead of coming out of the penis at the time of ejaculation. Similar to a dry orgasm, some men think it feels comparable to a normal ejaculation, others say it feels better, and some feel it is less pleasurable.

Chemotherapy

Chemotherapy for men is similar to what women experience in that it can make you feel fatigued, sick, or have a sore mouth. It can also cause hair loss and sensitivity to touch. It can also impact fertility, and it is generally recommended that if sexually active, a man use contraception to prevent pregnancy during treatment and for a period afterward. Sperm banking may also be desired.

Make sure to review with your physician when your white blood cell count is low (neutropenia) or you have a low platelet level (thrombocytopenia) as you will be at a higher risk for infection, bleeding, and bruising.

Cancer Sex Tips

Pain Medications

If you are taking pain medications, you may notice decreased sensations, so using sex toys like vibrators may be helpful to increase the intensity of what you feel. In addition, you may want to plan your sexual intimacy so that you can have taken your pain medications in advance and are not uncomfortable during sexual activity.

Birth Control & Cancer

What is best for you will depend on the type of cancer you have as well as the type of treatment you will receive. Contraception health risks can increase while receiving certain cancer treatments, such as increased blood clots or decreased effectiveness from birth control pills. Because chemotherapy reduces platelet counts, it can be a problem when taking Depo-Provera (medroxyprogesterone acetate). In addition, emergency contraception can have unwanted interactions with specific cancer treatments. Due to the complex nature of these concerns, it is best to speak with both your physician and your pharmacist about the best birth control for you during and after your cancer treatment.

Fatigue

If you feel more tired during certain times of the day, you may want to plan your sexual activity for when you feel most energized. It is normal to feel tired, especially if your treatment includes intensive chemotherapy. Make sure that you do not feel pressure to have sex, and if you just crave intimacy, you can simply touch one another without a sexual agenda. Just having some skin-to-skin contact can help reduce feeling isolation, anxiety, and depression.

Avoid Performance Anxiety

Avoid putting pressure on yourself to have an orgasm. This may make it challenging to have one, creating performance anxiety. Instead, allow sensual time for yourself to simply enjoy sexual touching of yourself or with a partner. See our Sex & Mindfulness Guide for more help with this.

Stomas & Sex

When treating some forms of cancer through surgery, you may require a stoma that opens your abdomen to remove feces and urine and is moved into a small bag. The need for a stoma can be temporary or permanent. When trying to participate in sexual activity, a stoma can feel challenging, and it will be essential to communicate with a partner what to expect upfront. Talking about it can help soothe any anxiety you may be feeling and make the experience more comfortable. Below are some tips for having sex with a stoma.

• Allow yourself ample time to get used to the bag.
• You will want to change the bag before sexual play.
• You may wish to cover the bag with fabric to prevent it from clinging to your skin and keep it out of sight.
• You can wear sexy, comfortable clothing that keeps it out of sight.
• You may want to wait 2-3 hours before having sex after a heavy meal.
• You can use stoma pouch deodorants to control odors, also known as ostomy deodorant supplies.
• Allowing your partner to see or touch the stoma may help put them at ease around it.

Immunosuppression

Cancer treatments can cause some people to become immunocompromised. This means that the body’s ability to fight infection and disease will be reduced. Because the immune system’s job is to defend your body, it can leave you much more vulnerable to other diseases, infections, and health complications.

There are various degrees of immunosuppression, and not all cancer treatments cause it. The primary treatments that increase the risks of infection are chemotherapy, radiation, and surgery. Having a suppressed immune system will mean taking precautions such as decreasing exposure to people, wearing an N95 or N100 mask, handwashing, using hand sanitizer, disinfecting your environment, using air filters, reducing your exposure to bacteria and fungi in dirt through activities such as gardening and other preventative measures.

Some cancer patients are given immunotherapies that encourage immune responses, which can help with these issues. Speak with your doctor about your specific levels of immunity and treatment options to ensure that you are protecting yourself.

Making sure you protect your sexual health is essential when you are immunocompromised. Practicing safe sex is an obvious way to do so. Also, being aware that you may be more vulnerable to a urinary tract infection (UTI) is something that you should consider. Ensure to empty your bladder before and after sexual activity to clear bacteria out of the urethra will help reduce your risks. If you have concerns about COVID, make sure to review our Sex & COVID Guide as well.

Of course, it’s always important to protect yourself regardless of being immunocompromised, but when undergoing cancer treatment, it is especially vital. Take precautions, be educated about immunosuppression risks, and protect your health.

Scars

While scars will fade over time, some may still be visible even after healing. Some people get tattoos to cover them or help them blend into the skin, while others allow them to be a positive message for them; recognizing that their scars make them a strong survivor.

Embracing who we are can be challenging, but our confidence and strength are more attractive than being without scars when we do it. Accepting and celebrating our body for all that it has gone through is undoubtedly a beautiful way to appreciate life and our time in it.

Helpful Guides

You may find the following guides helpful for sexual activity with cancer:

• Female Masturbation Tips
• Male Masturbation Tips
• Sex Positions With Sex Toys
• Clitoral & Vaginal Orgasm Guide
• Cunnilingus Techniques
• Fellatio: How To Give A Blowjob
• Fingering Tips For The Vagina
• Giving The Best Handjobs
• Anal Sex & Analingus
• How To Do Prostate Massage
• Sensual Massage Techniques

Alternatives To Sex

If you have a partner, there are other ways to enjoy intimacy beyond sex acts. Here are just a few:

• Sensual Massage
• Cuddling
• Kissing
• Talking
• Holding Hands
• Taking A Bath Or Shower Together
• Taking A Walk Together
• Taking A Car Ride Together
• Romantic Getaways & Adventures

Create A Sensual Environment

It can help to create a relaxing sensual environment to escape some of the stress that you have been feeling. Here are some ideas for creating that for just you or with a partner.

• Wear clothing that can make you feel sensual.
• Read erotic stories: see the free Erotic Stories we provide.
• Use soft lighting, massage candles, massage oils to create a sensual mood.

For more helpful ideas, please see the following guides:

• Stress & Sex
• Sex & Communication For Partners
• Foreplay Tips
• Improving Relationships
• Sex Therapy & Counseling

Sex Toys & Cancer 

Use sex toys helpful for cancer to help you with any physical challenges you may have. Vibrators can help stimulate nerve endings more efficiently than manual stimulation. They can increase blood flow and make it easier to orgasm. There are a variety of vibrators that can help one orgasm, such as clitoral vibrators as well as prostate and penis vibrators. 

Lubrication

Many cancer treatments can cause vaginal lubrication issues. It may be especially important to use pure and healthy lubricants during and after cancer treatment. That is why we have put together some helpful guides on lubricants that may be soothing during and after your treatment. Please speak with your physician about any specific health concerns that you will need to be aware of before selecting any lubrication to ensure that it is not problematic for your health.

• Why Use A Lubricant Guide
• The Ultimate Lubricant Guide
• Allergies To Lubricant Ingredients
• Natural & Organic Lubricants
• Paraben-Free Lubricants

Hands-Free Sex Toys

You may experience pain, fatigue or mobility issues with cancer treatments, so having a hands-free sex toy may be helpful. Remote control and app-controlled features can make them even easier to use. See our hands-free sex toys.

Wand Vibrators

Wand vibrators can be helpful for cancer patients and survivors because they allow the user to have a comfortable grip on a very powerful vibrator which can help overcome desensitization to the genitals from cancer treatments. They can be made hands-free by using a sex pillow mount. They also do not require pinpoint accuracy, so those with mobility issues or pain do not have to focus on holding them with great precision. See our Wand Vibrators

Lay-On Vibrators

Lay-on vibrators are any vibrator you can lay on your body and let stimulate your genitals, nipples, etc. These are often called panty vibrators because they can rest easily in the crotch of underwear. They, too, can be considered a hands-free option and may be helpful for cancer patients and survivors who have mobility issues, pain, or fatigue.

See our Lay-on Vibrators

Remote-Controlled Sex Toys

App-controlled and remote-controlled sex toys can be placed against the genitals and controlled remotely without holding the sex toy. They also can be helpful for cancer patients and survivors who have mobility issues, pain, or fatigue.

Couples Vibrators

Often marketed to couples, some vibrators can be used solo as well. An example of such couples sex toys are C-shaped vibrators which can be inserted to stimulate both the clitoris and G-spot hands-free. Couples vibrators are not just for couples and can be adapted to serve individuals with disabilities, mobility issues, low libido, desensitization of the genitals from cancer treatments.

Sex Pillows

Sex pillows are firm and ideal for holding your body in a comfortable position during sex; however, in addition, some models are designed to hold sex toys so that they can be used hands-free. They are ideal for cancer patients and survivors who have mobility issues, pain and need comfortable support during sexual activity.

Male Vibrators

Male vibrators can often be used hands-free. They are also ideal for men with erectile dysfunction (ED) issues that may be caused by cancer treatments, and some models can be used solo or with a partner.

Straps, Harnesses & Swings

Using sex toy swings, straps and harnesses, and other bedroom gear can help make sexual positions and sexual stimulation easier for cancer patients and survivors. See our Bedroom Gear for various options. 

Air Pulse Sex Toys

Some disability sex experts have suggested that air pulse sex toys are great for those with mobility issues because they do not have to be moved after they are put in place. These may also be helpful for cancer patients and survivors who have a difficult time achieving an orgasm because they are highly effective at stimulating the clitoris. However, it should be noted that you have to hold them in place over the clitoris to create a seal while using them, so it may not be a good option for people who are in pain or have mobility issues with holding sex toys.

Kegel Weights

After cancer treatments, some women may struggle with incontinence and weak pelvic floor muscles, so using Kegel weights may be helpful. They can also be beneficial in learning to relax muscles in cases of vaginal stenosis caused by cancer treatments such as radiation or surgery. Kegel weights are not necessary to do Kegel exercise but can assist in creating increased strength. See our Kegel Weights.

Anal Toys

Anal toys such as prostate massagers can help achieve an erection and may be helpful for some men after cancer treatment. Stimulation to the prostate has long been used to help achieve erections when there are challenges. Utilizing a prostate massager that is hands-free as well as featuring a remote control option can be quite helpful for those with mobility issues. Getting an anal toy with a flat, flared base may be preferable over one with a handle or ring as one can sit on them. See our Anal Toys.

Suction Cup Sex Toys

Sex toys that have suction cups on the bottom can allow for hands-free use and can be attached to headboards, chairs, tables, walls, showers, and more. They may be helpful for cancer patients who have issues with certain sex positions or who want something they can use without holding.

Wearable Vibrators

Wearable vibrators are hand-free and allow the user to wear them inside of underwear or when they have straps, like underwear. Like other hands-free sex toy options, cancer patients may like these as they can be worn without the effort of holding them in place. You will find these under hands-free sex toys.

Sex Toy Adaptations

There are three ways one can adapt a sex toy to meet their personal needs:

Combining Sex Toys

Combing sex toys such as putting a vibrating penis ring over a dildo to simultaneously stimulate the clitoris, anus, or perineum, depending on which way it is turned, can make it a dual-action sex toy. Inserting vibrators into masturbation sleeves can make them more stimulating, and you can put penis sleeves on top of dildos to make them thicker.

Altering A Sex Toy

You can alter sex toys to make them more user-friendly for you by adding a handle, using tape, tongs, and other tools to help make them easier to use. 

Using Sex Toys Intended For Another Purpose

Taking sex toys intended for something else and using them to meet your needs is a great way to get creative. For example, our strapless strap-ons designed as double dildos for partners can be used so that the end bulb is a handle instead.
(See our Strapless Strap-on Guide for more information). Other examples are penis rings that can also be used as finger vibrators or be slid over a dildo to to create a handle for it.

For more helpful ideas, please see the following guides:

• Sex Toys For Disabilities
• How To Choose A Vibrator
• How To Choose A Dildo
• Penis Rings Guide
• Using Sex Pillows To Make Sex Comfortable
• Sex Toys For Erectile Dysfunction
• Vaginal Dryness Remedies
• How To Use Couples Sex Toys
• Penis Masturbator Guide

 In Closing

We hope that this guide on sex and cancer has been helpful to you. We know that it has a lot of information to digest, and choosing sexual products can feel a bit overwhelming. Feel free to reach out to us for suggestions that may be helpful for you or your partner, as we are happy to help.